Finding Obsidian

07 - Unwelcome Sentimentalities

"No!"

The scream surrounded me. Everything was dark, but I could still hear that voice.

"No!"

I couldn't move. Fear locked my muscles into place, but the shriek persisted on. Always the same.

"No!"

Static. Unending. The same word, over and over agai—

"Rian!"

I bolted upright, gasping for breath. The back of my eyes burned, and I stifled a sob.

It had changed.

My fingers dug into the bedsheets, and I bit my lip until I tasted copper. That dream had been tormenting me for years, but it was always the same. Always that piercing screech. But this time . . .

"Don't think about it!" I said sharply, still a bit breathless. Nothing good would come of me dwelling on the past. I knew that, but ghosts of people long gone still haunted me wherever I went. I could only hope it wasn't the same for—

"No," I mumbled, a wave of exhaustion overcoming me. "He's fine. He doesn't remember."

I fell back, limp, and stared at the ceiling of my bedroom. There was a glimmer of sunlight peeking through the window blinds, but the beauty of the sunrise was wasted on me. I didn't have the right to appreciate beauty anymore.

My right hand throbbed painfully. "I should probably change the bandage," I murmured, trying to convince myself to move, but I remained where I was. Frozen, just like before.

A sharp knock on my bedroom door startled me out of my thoughts. I sat up hastily as Rokim stuck his head inside. "Rise and shine, Han!"

I blinked as he flicked on the lights. "What are you doing here so early?" 

"I figured you wouldn't be totally adjusted to the time difference, so I thought I'd pop by. Make sure you don't oversleep." Rokim tossed me a water bottle before closing the door. "Get changed, we leave in a half hour," he called, the wall muffling his voice.

I stared at the water bottle in my hands. It had already been a few days since Rian joined the class, and today was supposed to be the last day of his crash course. But after the dream I'd just had, my stomach churned at the thought.

"Ah, whatever!" I blurted, frustrated with myself. I marched to the bathroom, determined to forget after a long, hot shower.

Thirty minutes later, I emerged from my room fully dressed. Rokim was lounging on the couch, but sat up as I came out. "Ready to go?" he asked.

"Yep!" I declared resolutely. While in the shower, I'd figured that what was triggering everything—the episodes, the nightmares—was my interactions with Rian. As long as I kept my conversation with him to a minimum, I should be fine.

It probably won't even require much effort, I thought wryly. He's not exactly a chatterbox.

The walk to school went by quickly. Before I knew it, we were in class. I hesitated momentarily before heading inside.

Immediately, I heard Prof's voice echoing throughout the large room, giving specific assignments to each student. I used the familiar sound to reassure myself: everything would be fine.

I dropped my bag on my table and nodded to Rokim as he went over to his station. As I grabbed an apron off a nearby hook, I caught sight of Rian. 

He was already waiting in my kitchenette, leaning against the counter with a half-apron lazily tied around his waist. I forced myself not to look for too long; with every passing second, the pit in my stomach grew deeper.