~14~

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Jayden's POV

My mother ran after me with a baseball bat. She swung a few times, but never hit me. She was drunk and high, higher than I've ever seen her. I knew why... We all knew why.

My mother missed my sister, but she also hated how she gave birth to a baby, to only have both of them taken from us. She may not show her love how a mother should, but she did miss Luca. But since I also missed her, and was more vocal about it, she hated me. She hated me with a burning passion.

I can remember one night, she tripped and laid on the floor where she had fallen. I sat curled up in the corner of the room, sobbing. She looked at me, and sighed.

"Why couldn't I have lost you? Why did Luca die? She was always such a good girl. She never talked back. She didn't ruin my life like you did. You should've died. NOT HER." She yelled, and her voice dripped with anger and sadness.

I was scared to death after she said that. Because I knew something was coming. I tried to hide more often, and sometimes I would completely avoid home all together. I would stay at a friend's house, which only worked out a few times. Then I would sneak into a church sometimes. I would sleep in a pew, then before any of the Nuns found out, or even the preists, I would sneak out. But they knew. They would leave me food and clothes, and I would take it, and when I got any money, I would leave it there. I would donate to the church that helped me so much.

---

What really almost killed me was when my parents were worse than usual. They were fighting, and would even bring a gun into the house and play moving target practice with each other, or even us. It was always exciting in my household!

My father shot me. He thought it would be fun, and it was for him, but not for me. My mother was attempting to be sober, because once again she was pregnant. 

When the bullet hit my stomach, I started to cough up blood right away. I landed hard on the wood floor, and one of my older brothers ran to me. This was different than before. He never actual shot any of us, until now. My mother was even freaking out.

"She's just acting." My father laughed, as he sat his gun down, and walked over to the chair in the corner. He sat down and watched me, as I continued to cough.

"Ralph, you really hit her!" My mother exclaimed, as she awkwardly knelt down next to me. My brother was already pushing down on the wound, as tears ran down my cheeks. I looked over at my mother.

"I'm sorry!" I cried, and she shook her head but didn't speak.

"Ralph, call the hospital!" My mother exclaimed, but he shook his head.

"Natural selection, baby." He slurred, and he sounded so damn stupid.

"This isn't natural selection! This is our daughter! She's going to die and you'll go to jail for it!" She yelled, and I started to feel sleepy.

"Mom..." I slurred, and she shook her head.

"Okay, Jayden, we'll get you to the hospital. Alec, pick her up. Lets take her to the hospital." She spoke, and Alec nodded, before pulling his hands from my stomach, and I felt even weaker.

They drove me to the hospital, and left me in the ER parking lot. Rain poured down on me, and someone almost parked their car on me, but instead they saw me and got me help.

///

I was in the hospital for a month. I had gotten four infections, and several times, I flat lined.

I almost died so many times, that they sent me to a foster home after I was released. But once again, it didn't take long before my parents had me back. This time, my mother was little nicer than before. However, my father decided to sell the pain medicine and the antibiotics also. He killed 12 people in my house when they over dosed on my pills. The pills I needed, were used for a selfish reason, and a horrible reason.

While I was in the hospital, he beat Alec for taking me to the hospital, and when I got home, he didn't even look at me. He didn't even talk to me about the simplest things.

It was the start of my end. I wasn't going to be apart of their family anymore. I was going to be strictly a Stabler, only a few short years of foster homes, a stint in an orphanage, and group homes. Stuff was horrible, but it was a better horrible than what I was used to.

The house before I was placed with you, was decent. They loved me, and I loved them. Yet, it was more of the love you get when someone protects you. I felt the same way with a few families before, but the way they loved me was different from the way I loved them. 

They had four kids, all girls who were adorable, and surprisingly well behaved for being four girls living in the same house together. One had down syndrome. One had autism. And the other two had physical disabilities. I enjoyed being able to help them. I was home schooled there, and got to help the other girls with schools. 

But Mom, Dad, even though I was happy there, I'm happier here. I'm sorry for being a horrible daughter, and causing you all pain. I'm truly sorry.

I'm glad that you both are happy. That you both can smile, and it isn't forced. That you both live together again, because Dad is a way better cook than you, Mom.

But what I'm really trying to say is thanks. Thanks for everything, because if it wasn't for you two getting together, I probably would've died when I was younger. Because I'm meant to be with you.

I love you both so much,

Jayden

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