To Love the Rain

Chapter Nineteen

When I awoke, it was in my own bed again.

My head was killing me, and everything was pitch black. I blinked blearily in the oppressing darkness, and groaned. The blinds in my room were still closed, and since I couldn't feel the wind washing over my sheets, I knew that my windows were closed as well.

What happened?

Slowly, but surely, my eyes adjusted to the dark, and I began to see again.

I lifted my arms slowly, and touched my bare skin.

I wasn't dead yet.

So, what happened?

Random thoughts swam around my head blearily as I blinked the sleep out of my eyes. I pushed myself up, and looked around. Everything was a blurry, unfocused mess.

What the hell happened?

Suddenly, I spotted something on my dresser.

I flicked on the nightlight I had since I was a little kid, and stared.

It was a bowl of stir fry.

I stretched out my arm, and touched the cool, cracked wood of the age-old dresser. I traced my finger along its rough edges until, finally, I touched the smooth porcelain bowl. It was cold to the touch, and sleek.

It was real.

It was there.

It was stir fry.

I laughed suddenly, a disbelieving cough that didn't seem to hurt.

It was stir fry.

A memory floated to the forefront of my mind, the whisperings of an echo from a time so seemingly long ago.

You lucky bastard.

Your mom's stir fry is freaking legendary.

Share?

Pretty, pretty please?

A lone tear slipped from my eye.

Mom...

She- after all this time- she-

I can't believe-

She-

She still loves me...

She still loves me.

She still loves me!

Momma's still got me!

Oh God.

I was so horrible to her, I was so, so horrible to her!

Everything I did- all the times I yelled at her, to the times I refused to eat, to the times I threw away my pills, slammed back into me with the force of a tsunami wave, and I crumped underneath its force. And I started crying.

As in, horrible, heart stopping crying.

I was such a bad son!

I was such a piece of shit!