Bleeding Color

24. Scars

"The way I see it," she says, "scars are just stories I got stuck with. Tattoos are the ones I choose."

"And the last tattoo? The feather on your collarbone?"

Logan smirks at me. "I can still keep some things to myself."

Keeping to herself spirals my thinking into wondering why Logan all the sudden had a change of heart and stopped pushing me away. She's been an open book lately so I don't hesitate to ask her, "What changed your mind? What made you stop pushing me away?"

Logan settles, relaxing the brush in her hand, and turns to me. All her attention focuses on me, and the butterflies forming in my stomach start pounding their way out. "When I woke up that morning in the hospital and you were the first one I saw, I realized that I didn't want to wake up to anyone else."

I smirk, remembering when I initially rejected Logan and what she had teased me with back then. "Is that your way of admitting you have feelings for me?" I quip.

"Cameron," Logan sets her palette and brush on a small worktable beside her and scoots to the edge of her stool to inch as close to me as possible. "That's my way of admitting I'm in love with you."

Time slows to a standstill and Logan's words echo through my mind. I swallow hard, making an attempt to move but my body becomes immobile from a spell Logan unknowingly put me under. My mind screams at my body to speak, but instead of saying anything, I lunge forward, crashing my lips to Logan's. I force myself to pull away from her in order to give her a proper response, but it doesn't come.

Logan shrugs and smiles at me, "Rule number two: You get attached? You're screwed." She teases.

I stand up abruptly, pulling Logan into me, kissing her again. Logan and I do what we do best and lose ourselves in one another, this time getting lost in each other's embrace. I slide her button down off of her shoulders, and my eyes briefly connect with the scar on her chest as I break away from a kiss. Logan is nearly half a foot taller than me, but right now it doesn't feel like she towers over me for once. I'm used to looking up to Logan like she has all the power, but I don't feel that right now. She doesn't hold any power, she's just holding onto me. I trace my finger down the scar on her chest that recently healed back over, and pull Logan into another embrace.

She doesn't initiate anything, and I'm afraid this isn't what she wants. In the back of my mind, I know I'm wrong. She's just terrified. She doesn't realize that I am too. I've never been with anyone. Not the way I'm about to be with her. I've come close to being with others, but something has always stopped me before right now. We slowly collapse on the floor of her loft, and being with Logan isn't how I ever imagined it would be. I always imagined she'd take over and I'd follow her lead, but it's the complete opposite. She waits for me to start lifting the sweatshirt before she slides it over my head. She waits for me to initiate everything, and I wonder if this means the same to her as it does to me. My doubts disperse with every touch, and every time her lips press against me.

Logan gently lowers me onto my back, and her dark hair cascades around me in waves, sending chills down my body as her lips trail down my torso. She trails her way back up my body, and I lose all coherent thoughts as Logan's warm breath reaches my ear. She presses her lips down my neck again, and my back arches in response to her lightly biting my neck. She moves back to my lips and interrupts by asking if I'm okay and I smile at her, falling for her more and more with every second that passes. I nod, assuring her I'm more than okay, and try to speak in response, but unable to form a intelligible sentence.

Logan kisses me again, breaking once more to slide her bra off, and my heart fights it's way out of my ribcage as I'm mesmerized by her every move and every curve of her body. As her lips collide with mine again, I take the opportunity to roll Logan over, swinging a leg around her waist as I do so. She reaches for my back, unclasping my bra without any effort and I'm not at all surprised she's become a master of undressing women. I pull away from her, her lips chasing after mine, and stare at the beauty before me. I don't know much about art, but I do know my favorite masterpiece is the one before me in this moment – scars and all.

Logan catches me off guard and regains control, stealing all the air from my lungs as my back gently connects with the cold, rough tarp beneath us. I don't mind our surroundings or the hard contrast of the floor against our bodies, I only care that I'm with Logan. She trails her way back down my stomach, and I gasp involuntarily as she begins to tease me.

➳ ➳ ➳

Logan exhausts me by the morning. I wake up in her bed after a night blurred by lust that I never want to forget, and as I glance around Logan's apartment, a smile pulls at the corner of my lips seeing the damage we caused from the night before. Logan's flat, black couch is tilted and has blankets pouring in every direction, her kitchen has utensils spilled on the floor from when she lifted me and pushed them too aggressively out of her way, and her comforter sits in a balled mess at the foot of the bed. I roll over and lose myself in awe watching Logan sleep beside me.

Her breath is shallow, and her hair a beautiful mess – a casualty from the night before. A sheet barely covers her bare skin, and her eyebrows are furrowed ever so slightly from her dreaming. I've never felt so overwhelmingly captivated by anyone or anything in my life. I could lay here watching her forever.

An idea washes over me, and I hesitate to move in order to make it happen. I linger just above Logan for a moment before pressing my lips against hers. I don't feel her lips press back, and break the kiss, hovering above her for a moment. Before I have time to move, Logan's head jerks forward, and her hand pulls me into her.

"Nice try, darling." She says with a smirk as our lips part.

"You kissed me back." The shock in my voice cannot be contained, and my cheeks begin to redden as Logan's crooked smile twists into a small smirk.

Logan sends me a smile, her blue eyes sparkling in the early sunlight. "I'll always kiss you back."

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Chapter song: "XO" by Beyoncé

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Until next time,
Adrienne c: