When Spring Comes

~~~Prologue ~~~

       
       I opened my eyes to a hospital room and I felt so dazed. Then, the memories came crashing back and I shook my head in fear.

      "No! No! Jimmy!" I screamed.

     A nurse came running in and I was filled with hysteria. "Where is Jimmy?" I asked.

      "Miss, you have to calm down."

      I shook my head. "No, I have to die."

      I clutched her hands and the last thing I saw as the syringe pierced my flesh was a doctor walking in and I drifted to oblivion once again.

      When I forced my eyelids open to a startling silence I wasn't used to, I found Mae staring at me with sadness in her eyes. She forced a smile and I couldn't speak, I just stared back, fighting all thoughts away and feeling blank.

     "Hi there." Mae said.

     Tears rolled down my cheeks. "Hey."

      "How are you feeling?"

      "How is Jimmy? Why hasn't he come, Mae?"

      "Paisley..."

      "Mae, please don't tell me it's all true."

      "Paisley..."

      "Jimmy is fine, right?"

      Mae sat down on the bed next to me, "Hey, you'll be fine, sweetie, you just have to. Paisley, we can't lose you too."

      "So, you're telling me Jimmy is really gone?" I forced myself to say.

      "Stop crying. You'll make it through this."

      I shook my head. "No, I won't." I cried harder. "I can't believe this. Just go away. You're a liar, Mae. Jimmy is still around. I don't know what's keeping him but I'm pretty sure I'll see him soon. I'll just wait here and..."

      "Paisley." Mae took my cheeks. "Don't lose it, okay? Jimmy. Is. Gone."

      "Shut the hell up. Just get out! Get out of my sight!" I screamed. I couldn't believe any of this. I felt so empty and was out of breath.

      "Paisley..."

      I shook my head rapidly, "No! No! No! This is  dream." I was getting dizzy.

      Mae left the room and ran in shortly with a nurse. "She's gonna be fine." The nurse told Mae.

      "No!" I screamed. "Jimmy!" I cried in enormous pain. I didn't even flinch when I felt the needle and I shut my eyes gratefully with Jimmy's voice in my head, 'I promise you I'm never gonna leave you, okay?'

      When I flicked my eyes open the third time to a hospital room, my first in unconscious act was expressed in the tears flowing slowly down my cheeks. I was alone in the room and I couldn't believe it, any of it; cause life wasn't such a bitch to carry out such a cruel act. Yet, I come feel it, the blatant loneliness tearing at my heart, the deep ache in my soul, the horrible loss at the pit of my guts and the trembling fear I couldn't fight off. I felt so angry at everything, at fate, the world, everyone. Mostly, at Jimmy Davies.

      How dare he come into my life with  nothing short of a single warning and rip away the largest part of my heart, body and soul; just to leave them in shredded pieces right before vanishing into thin air. I cried, calmly at first, then, my tiny intact pieces shattered and I bawled like a little child, screaming out profanities I never thought I could speak in between.