If I Lose Myself

Chapter Sixteen: Draco

If I Lose Myself

by EMPG22HoPe

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Chapter Sixteen: Draco

March 1997

Draco finally had progress with the Vanishing Cabinet.

He's put everything that could possibly make him vulnerable to the side, including his friends. Since the Hogsmeade incident between Blaise and Theo, Draco had decided that it was about time he stopped running around trying to get a grip of his friend. He's spent the last month worrying about Blaise so much that it had made him forget about fixing the Vanishing Cabinet. He couldn't possibly go two seconds without Pansy running up to him and screeching that Blaise was about to chuck himself off the bloody Astronomy Tower.

But Blaise was in the hospital wing now, a lot longer than he had thought. Apparently Theo had broken both of Blaise's legs when Astoria specifically instructed Daphne and Pansy to keep them separate. That didn't go so well apparently. Now Draco hasn't even visited Blaise in the hospital wing, nor has he talked to Pansy since then. Pansy was persistent, trying to cough up whatever she could from him – but he remained impassive, as he had with other people.

He needed to focus.

The Vanishing Cabinet finally worked one Tuesday afternoon at the start of the month when Draco placed a green apple inside and incanted the healing charm. It took a few tries, but in the end; with his wretched heart simply set on the mission the Dark Lord had sent, fear of losing his parents and his life – the green apple disappeared from sight. And only just a few seconds after incanting Harmonia Nectere Passus once more, the green apple had reappeared – only this time, someone had bitten into it.

Aunt Bellatrix must have received the apple. It had been her behind the cabinet's twin in Borgin & Burke's daily to check and see if Draco was doing any good with it. Now, it seemed like he was one step closer to just ending the mission at hand. The back-up plan could work.

Draco wanted to burst with joy. It took most of his self-control not to shake Blaise awake in the hospital wing and tell him what he's done. It felt like the huge weight set upon him had vanished in spite of its momentary feeling. He had done it! And yet, he still had a long way to go. But he rejoiced nonetheless, already feeling lighter than he ever had since the start of the year.

Yet of course, nothing good for long ever happened to Draco since he took the dark mark. There will always be something that would dampen his ego and pride, even in the smallest of package. One package, much to Draco's annoyance, was specifically of poisoned mead.

He'd overheard Millicent and Pansy talking about it over breakfast one morning.

"Yeah, just like I heard it! Dropped dead like a rag doll, the weak Weasel." Millicent chortled between bites of Sheppard's pie as she eyed Pansy. "I'm not surprised, though. He's a menace at Quidditch as he is a menace at getting drunk. What a loser. Gotten himself sent to the hospital wing because of that ol' mead. Slughorn says that it was poisoned mead, but I seriously doubt it."

"Poisoned mead?" Draco asked, his interest piqued as he set his fork down. "What are you talking about, Bulstrode?"

"I see you're talking again." Pansy sneered at him curiously. Draco ignored her.