Jake's Scrapbook

Dead Reckoning Heartworm

  It was nice to know someone loved him. To know someone would always be there for him in this absolutely shitty world.

  But she got overwhelming.

  Duke couldn't scold anyone at practice wihout Charlie telling him off for it. She didn't like when he hurt anyone.

  He couldn't go out without her asking if he had talked to any cute girls. Duke knew Charlie knew of his fuckboy qualities.

  He couldn't be himself.

  And as much as that irritated him, he was willing to morph into someone else whenever he was with Charlie. Because he loved her. And he didn't want to lose the shot he had at someone giving him love and affection that nobody else wanted to give him.

  Love and affection everyone thought he didn't deserve.

  But she didn't think that.

  Even if she hated the way he hurt people, Charlie loved who he was. And she never asked him to change.

  She was intoxicating.

  The way she cared for him. Loved him. Accepted him.

  He couldn't get enough of it.

  But eventually it became too much. Her nagging.

  Duke walked through the door of his quiet home. Luke and Monte were probably sleeping. It was 1 am. When he flicked the light on in the living room, there sat Charlie. Arms crossed and so were her legs. Staring at him from the couch.

  "Where were you."

  He gazed quietly at the small Latina. Swallowing hard.

  He had a one night stand.

  That hadn't lasted long because the girl got a call from her boyfriend.

  "I..I was.." Duke chewed his lip.

  "You were out. You got drunk. You look pretty fucking drunk. You look like a mess. You smell like perfume. Your pants are jumbled up. Who'd you fuck Duke? Hmm?" She stood up rather quickly.

  Walking towards him in an angry stalking like manner. She jabbed her finger in his chest. Pushing him back. Duke stared silently at Charlie.

  "Who did you fuck. Did the slut scream? Did you fuck her brains out good? Hm? Am I not good enough?" Duke hated this. Why did she hop on his dick about this all the time.

  He could say sorry and she wouldn't care. She'd revert back to her happy go lucky self but there'd still be resent in her eyes. And that irritated him.

  It made him insecure.

  It drove him insane.

  "You're so fucking incon-"

  "No, you know what! No!"

  Duke saw Charlie jolt a little as he burst suddenly. And as much as it hurt him. He had to get this over with.

  He was already crazy.

  "I can't go out by myself and have fun once in a while because the minute I get back, there you are. Sitting on the fucking couch. With your arms AND your legs crossed, who fucking does that? Looking like you're about to judge whether I pass into the goddamn afterlife." Duke snapped.

  Charlie opened her mouth but nothing came out.

  "Maybe I did fuck someone. But it doesn't matter. Because I'm done with you. I'm ending this. Right here. Right now."

  Immediately he could see everything joyful leave her body. It was surreal. Like suddenly color had drained from her whole being.

  But he couldn't stop. He couldn't say "I didn't mean it, I'm sorry, I love you."

  Because it wasn't true. It was a lie.

  And he couldn't hold it anymore.

  "You're not good for me. You're ruining me. You're destroying me."

  "You can't do this-"

  "Get your shit and get out of my house."

  "YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME, DUKE!"

  "YES I CAN, BECAUSE YOU DON'T EXIST."

  "…Duke?" Luke's groggy voice called. Duke looked back to see Luke and Monte standing there, confused.

  He took several deep breaths.

  "Who were you talking to?" Monte rasped. Gazing in a concerned and confused way.

  Duke glanced in front of him.

  Charlie was gone.

  As if she was never there..

  "..Nobody..I'm sorry.. Go back to sleep.." Duke murmured. He headed to his room, rubbing his face.

  Luke and Monte exchanged gazes. Luke's eyes eventually followed Duke's form as he walked to his room. Then he wrapped his arm around his lover, leading Monte back to their room.

  "How can he be hung up over a girl he never met that died 3 years ago?"