Mary Grace

Thirty-Six

Napatitig ako sa kawalan. Then I slowly spoke, "Hey, now that I think about it. John Will, sobrang madaya ka. You suddenly left without giving me a chance to get to know you." I swallowed. "Tell me, ganun na ba talaga kahirap sa mundo para magpakamatay?" I wandered out loud.

"Mary Grace?" For a moment, I thought John Will answered me. But the voice is different. I turned around and my heart immediately raced inside of my chest when I saw Jeremy. Just like Mom, he had dark circles under his eyes. He lost some weight and his hair is messy, like he just got out of bed and decided to head straight here without taking a shower. My gaze darted on the flowers on his right hand. Nagkatitigan kami bago siya napabuntong-hininga. He walked towards me, place the flowers on his friend's tombstone and glanced at me.

"Where the fuck have you been?" His voice is dangerously low, parang nagpipigil ng galit. I swallowed.

"I... uh..."

"I think we need to talk, Mary Grace," Biglang kinurot ang puso ko sa boses niyang basag. I nodded my head immediately. It's about time I settle things down with Jeremy.

We said our goodbye's to John Will. Tahimik kaming naglakad sa parking lot. The ride all the way to his apartment is uncomfortably quiet as well. I keep on stealing glances from him but his eyes were fixed on the road, his knuckles turning white from gripping the steering wheel too hard and I think he is in deep thoughts.

Sinundan ko siya sa loob ng apartment niya. He did not even bother to go upstairs that made me sigh in relief. Naupo siya sa sofa kung saan ko nakitang nakaupo si John Will noong gabing nag-away kaming dalawa.

"So..." He said, looking at me intently. "Care to explain why I couldn't contact my girlfriend for the past few days and why she haven't showed up? Kung hindi ako nagpunta sa sementeryo, malamang hindi ko alam na buhay ka pa pala," He said sarcastically.

Napayuko ako. "Jeremy... I was in Mavulis Island."

His brows furrowed. "Mavulis Island? Where the fuck is that? At bakit hindi ko yan alam? Nag-bakasyon ba kayo ng mga magulang mo?"

I shake my head slowly which confused him even more. A sob rose to my throat. I'm afraid to see him. I'm afraid to be in the same room with him right now. Nagsisimula nang manginig ang mga labi ko. Hindi ko alam kung papaano ko sasabihin sa kanya.

"Well? Mary Grace?" He pressed, I can feel his impatience.

"I was with Harry." I finally blurted out.

"Ano?" I flinched at his voice. I could feel the anger boiling inside of him. "You were with him, alone?" I dared to look at his face. His jaw is clenched and I swear I could see the fire dancing in his eyes as the overwhelming emotions started to consume him.

"Yes." Mahina kong sagot. I yelped when he suddenly shove the telephone near him. It crashed into the wall, breaking into large pieces.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" He screamed at me.

Nanglambot bigla ang mga tuhod ko. I was about to open my mouth when my phone rang. Napatingin kaming dalawa sa bulsa ko. I fished it out of my pocket and before I could see the caller, Jeremy grabbed it harshly from my hands.

He place the phone on his ears and for a moment, my heart exploded inside of my chest because it could be my mother.

"What the fuck do you want from my girlfriend?!" He shouted on the other line. I sank deeper into my seat. I figured out it must be Harry. "Stop messing up with my girl because I swear, kapag nakita ko pa ang pagmumukha mong hayop ka I will fucking kill you!" He said before he threw my phone against the wall as well. It shattered into pieces on the ground. His chest is rising up and down rapidly, as if the emotions are getting the worst out of him.

"Jeremy..." I said, tears brimming in my eyes. "I...I think we should break up." Lakas-loob kong sabi sa kanya.

For a moment, there was silence. Then he growled again. "Bakit? Because of Harry? Are you fucking Harry right now?" He approached me slowly na mas lalong nagpakaba sa akin. I wanted to ran to the door and get away from him. But unlike the last time, John Will isn't around anymore to protect me from him.

"N-No.." I shake my head, tears streaming down my face in fear.

He leaned in closer. I could smell the alcohol and smoke reeking out of him. "Bakit, Mary Grace?" Buong-diin niyang tanong sa akin.

Before I could answer, he suddenly pushed me on the couch and went on top of me. Then he snarled, "You were fucking with him, huh?" As he ripped my jacket open. I tried to get off him but he was too strong. Nagsimula na akong umiyak sa takot. "Well, Mary Grace, I'll show you how hard I can fuck. Afterwards, you can compare who can fuck better between the two of us."

He buried his face on my neck and bite it with such force I screamed out loud. But just like the first time it happened to me, the room only swallowed my screams and cries for help.

It's like I'm thrown back into my 8-year old self when Uncle Thomas raped me. But with a different face this time. Jeremy's face.