chapter twenty-four - forgive and forget

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Casey

We're all in Hair's basement, the boys playing video games, Jovie and Haze comforting me on the couch while I ignore multiple calls and texts from Mom. 

"Maybe you should answer her, Kitten," Haze suggests.

"I can't," I whisper. "Haze, she's just letting this man into our home whom hasn't been here for us since I was twelve! I want nothing  to do with him anymore! And my mom hasn't even been around at all this year! I've only seen her maybe a handful of times! She doesn't understand the pain that she and him both have put on the four of us!"

"But they're your parents, Casey."

"They are not  my parents. I can't remember the last time I saw my mom, and I can't remember the last time he  acted as a father to us!"

"Okay, maybe so, but at least they're still here, Casey!"

I stare at him, the room dead silent.

He sighs softly and looks away. Hair and Khakis whisper something to the boys, and they and Jovie all go upstairs to Hair's bedroom. I look at Haze who's staring down at his lap.

"You have no idea what lengths I'd go to to see my parents again," he whispers. "I - I'd kill someone to see my parents again, Casey, I'd risk my life to see them again. A - And my dad was an alcoholic and my mom was a drug addict. But damn it all, they treated us three like we were kings. When we were all together, we were so happy." He looks at me and strokes my cheek. "You don't know how unhappy you are, Casey. I look at you all of the time and you have no idea how unhappy you are. I see all of the pain you're in, Case, and I know you were happy when all of you were together. But you're dad left and your mom buried herself in multiple jobs to keep you five afloat."

My heart aches at the pain in his eyes. What have I done? I'm an awful girlfriend.

"Never  take your family for granted, baby," he whispers. "Because you could lose them in an instant. Permanently. All it takes is one drunk driver, one mentally or emotionally injured person, one angry person, one drugged up addict, one normal person not paying attention, or even just awful timing. Anything could happen, Case. Don't take what you've got for granted. That's why I spend as much time as I can with my brothers. Because I refuse to take them for granted, because they and you are all I've got left, baby."

My throat tightens and a few tears fall down my face. "God, I'm such an awful person."

He holds my face. "No. No, you're not baby, you're just confused."

"I'm just so angry," I whisper.

"I know, beautiful. Just think about it, okay?"

I nod, pressing my forehead against his. "Thank you."

"I love you."

I rub my nose against his. "I love you too."

He smiles and pulls me to him, kissing me softly.

******

"You got this," Tony assures me, the four of us standing on the front porch of our house. "We just walk in and the three of us haul ass to our rooms while you, Mom, and Dad talk."

I roll my eyes. "Great. Thanks."

The three nod and I take a shaky breath, slowly opening the door, finding Mom and The Man watching TV, but seeming distracted.

Probably because their kids have been gone for hours.

"Guys!" Mom gasps when she sees us, running over and only holding the boys tight since I keep my distance. "You scared us!"

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