Small Talk

sunburnt hearts

you weren't there when i thought i needed you most.

instead, you were lingering beneath the surface,

emerging through my lost hope and empty expectations,

proving that good things really do come to those who wait.

it started with sandy hands and sunburnt hearts,

the first sip of alcohol on our tongues – sweeter than poison –

spurred on by the rush of youthful temptation:

what's the point of being a teenager if you don't do the things you're not supposed to do?

it didn't take me long to dive in

(although i think you'd pulled me under before we'd even met),

and soon sunkissed sand and ocean waves melted into

the dappled moonlight gliding across the undisturbed turquoise of the pool.

we had alcohol dancing on our tongues,

crawling down the back of our throats –

too much, yet not enough.

it was the glittering excitement of uncovering someone's secrets;

as if you're treading on land that's never been explored before.

a landscape, just for you,

filled with undulating questions,

filled with bodies of answers,

filled with a canopy of flirtations.

the aqua of the pool was reflected in your eyes –

although i later learnt that they were green,

not the dilated turquoise i thought i saw that night.

the moon was growing in my heart,

the sun burned in the places where our skin touched.

you held my hand.

it didn't fit right, but it felt fitting.

you might've kissed me too,

but i turned my head,

too scared to wake up from my daydream.

there was something awoken in the air between us that night;

something more than the sea breeze and the moonlight and the alcohol.

i expected it to stay awake until the morning,

but we hid it behind sunglasses and buried it underwater.

it lingered beneath the surface;

dormant, like a volcano –

inactive, but not extinct.

until the next night.

it was awoken again by

another sip of disappointment,

another rush of youth,

another overdose of alcohol.

the clouds danced on the pool's liquid ceiling,

weaving between the reflection of the moonlight.

a full moon –

almost as full as my heart.

this time, we explored further into this undiscovered land;

rifling through the jagged shards of broken hearts,

undressing well-disguised secrets,

tiptoeing over the horizon towards renewed hopes.

and this time, it's still awake in the morning.

another gulp of disappointment,

followed by the aftertaste of alcohol.

i tell you what you need to hear,

and you give me your heart in return.

but i press our bodies together,

right where our hearts meet,

and tell you that you're going to have to keep it.

time runs away from us –

slipping through our hands like saltwater –

and it's not enough, yet it's just the right amount.

i got what i wanted:

i dove into your waters

and swam with you amongst

the promise of youth,

the rush of fresh love,

the sting of broken hearts.

summer tasted even sweeter with your name on my lips.

if i could pause time,

i would linger in this moment for as long as it took for the seconds to start ticking again.

but instead, i'll return to reality,

and keep this daydream alive in my memories.

and should we become strangers,

at least we will share

the memory of a moonlit summer.

you were everything i'd been hoping for.