Pain Is Shared

one

WARNING- This book can very much be a trigger warning to people suffering with anorexia as well as bulimia. Please lovies, do not read if you are suffering or will be triggered at all. Also, please be safe, it will get better. You are enough and I love you all. Please, get help, tell someone, I promise you this will get better. You are enough lovies. If you ever need someone to talk to, message me at anytime <3

Disclaimer ~Yes, I know a lot of things are changed in this story. Like, I know that Liam only had issues between birth and four and then check ups in between and also that his kidney healed itself in 2012 but just bear with me here :)

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-the picture attached is Shea, a model called Emily Rudd is who Shea looks like-

~3 Years Prior~

I opened my eyes and yawned, I looked around the room. I saw the usual large glass windows that were decorated with pictures I had drawn and quotes I had picked and written out in pretty letters. My guitar and my ukulele sat up against the wall.

My stomach growled and I looked down, slapping it quickly to shut it up and chugging the glass of water on my bedside table.

I put down the empty glass and grabbed my mobile, opening messages, immediately texting my best friend to see if he was up.

I heard a soft knock on the door before the familiar red haired nurse called Kendra walked in cheerfully with the usual tray of food that she set down next to me.

"Good morning Shea. Alright this morning?" She asked.

"I'm well Kendra, thanks." I said.

"Alright then, have a bite to eat yeah?"  She said. I just nodded at her solemnly.

I'm currently in the hospital in inpatient for anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa. I arrived here a few months ago when I fainted in the washroom from lack of food and my mom found me. I️ weighed 36 kg (81 lbs) when I️ first came in.

My best mate is Liam and he's in inpatient too but because of his kidneys. He had kidney damage to one of them and we were on the same inpatient floor because we were in the pediatric ward. When I first came here, he came and held my hand when I️ was scared, even though he didn't know me properly.

I picked my mobile back up and finished the text to Liam to ask if he was awake yet.

I lifted the lid on the tray to reveal my breakfast food for the day. Today there was an egg sandwich on a bagel with bacon on it.

You don't need it fat cow.

The voice inside my head talked and I shook my head, not that that would get rid of it but I️ tried. I picked at the edge of the bagel, putting a few bits in my mouth but gagging as I chewed. They required me to eat a bit every day and it made me sick. I didn't need to make myself fatter than I already was.

I chugged the glass of water that was next to the tray and I put the cover back over the tray, putting it to the side of me.

I pulled my light blue cover away from me and got up out of bed, still in my flannel jogger bottoms and jumper as I slipped my feet into my soft brown slippers. I opened the door that separated me from the rest of the hospital and exited, watching the doctors and nurses in uniform chivvying along.