Paying For Love [3]

(13) kiss her at the door pt; 1

I laughed a lot because of her today.

My laughter died to soft smiles when we got to pavement again. Her eyes sparkled with such glint when catching the beautiful lights of mechanics and skies on the other side.

The carnival was beautiful yet gross, and the seats on the rides we went on were dirtied. I didn't hesitate to protect her and her dress by putting my jacket underneath her, so she could ride comfortably.

She won me a teddy bear after I failed many times. I told her to keep it, but she pouted, gave me everything in her eyes and had me cave in fast.

What bothered me about these perfect hours was the occasional times I'd have to let her hand go. When crowded in areas of the park, my hand would leave hers, my mask would be back on, and I'd walk distanced. She wouldn't look at me when I did that, playing into the façade of being separate.

It was honourable and kind for her to think about me during this night. Think about my reputation, my fans, and my role as an idol. It was nice, I must admit, but it was also belittling to her character and I didn't ever want any girl to feel as if I were embarrassed of them...

So, when people weren't looking, I had my attention on her more than my hands that never seemed to forget her waist. I made her feel wanted through genuine eyes, hearing her laugh and match my joyfulness just the same.

I laughed a lot because of her today.

"Jin?" she laughs again. The same ring to my ears that evolved throughout the night.

From 7pm to almost 10pm, you made my heart flutter in ways I hadn't experienced to such depth in my years as an idol.

Never did I think I'd grow to have a youthful crush again, and yet... I smile at my thoughts, staring at your face that is trying to get my attention again.

You wave your hand in my face. I blink, you laugh. "You alright?" your sweet voice whispers, concern trying to hide behind your pupils.

It seeps out and I read you easy.

"Yes, more than fine." My hands awkwardly dig into my pockets. I stare at my feet and then awkwardly find your eyes again.

You stand in front of me.
You stand in front of me with a blanket I bought special for your cold shoulders tonight.

Draped in the fabric, you look cozy and warm with a crazy bun you created on the drive home – hair falls out to lamely stick in directions mid-air.
I teased you about it, calling it 'cute baby hair' when you'd nudge me.

"Did you have fun tonight?"

You nod, biting your lip from smiling to largely. I see the way you look at my lips but I'm nervous. I want to kiss you. I've wanted to kiss you ever since we sat on our seats by the Ferris wheel first round...but I'm a coward when it comes to making a move suddenly.

Teasing and flirting is one thing...kissing her and actually meaning it would be another...

"Thank you for being sweet to me." Your voice is quiet.

I nod. "It's hard to be rude to girls like you."

"Girls like me?" Your brows furrow.

I leap. Not wanting any misunderstandings, I come fast with my corrections. "Girls as beautiful and lively as you..." I awkwardly grin, "t-that's what I meant, I-" I poke my tongue to the side of my cheek and look down to my feet.

I hear you breathe.

It's clear you're listening to me breathe as well.

Then you speak of a topic that makes me smile. "The food sitting well with you?" you ask, breaking the soft atmosphere around us.

"Carnival food never has a good ending," I mumble, smiling more heartfully now, "I'll probably be on the toilet all of tomorrow."

You laugh. I stare at the way your lips part.

"Meaning we probably won't be seeing each other tomorrow?" You're back to flirting.

I flirt back, grin lazy by the sides of my mouth. "Depends."

"On your bowel movements or...?"

"Or."

"Or what?" you ask softly, biting your lips again.

"Depends on how tonight ends..." my smile is suddenly shy when I purse my lips and nibble on the flesh myself.

You aren't shy when you try to hide your smile. That only makes me more incapable to make a move that you're looking forward to. I see the eagerness in your eyes. I want it too. Trust me, I want her.

"How would you like it to end?"

I lick over my bottom lip while stepping forward. "Like this," I see with a whisper, nose nudging yours so you shift upwards, successfully allowing my mouth to bravely capture yours.

You smile against my lips when I lightly kiss you. Feeling your soft hands come out from under the blanket that hides you, you hug my chin with your fingers and try to inch close.

I allow you, deeply growing my tongue to push through your parted lips that invite me.

Your chest heaves, leaning against mine in defeat.

Now I'm the one smiling, tripping into you when you try to break for air. I don't allow it, teasing you and your mouth and never giving your lungs a catch.

You win the battle of tongues when you dig your nails into my shoulder, moan, and wrap one bare leg of yours around my waist.

"Open the door." My voice is so low, so hoarse, and so needy for this affection. Trust me, I fucking want her.

Your bottom lip quivers after I nip your lips with mine. Hand moving off my shoulder and over to the door, your leg is off from around me in an instant, your head snapping back for a loud moan that echoes in the hallway.

I cover your mouth and you giggle at my palm.

Hugging my shoulders and legs tangling with each other's feet, I accidentally step on your feet that wears muddy heels, and you stomp on mine that are dirtied less. Our breaths hitch in pain from the haste, but neither of us stop and that's what I want. This is what I want.

My hand grips the doorframe when you trip backwards inside. The door slams the room's wall, opening and inviting our lustful bodies. I grip on the wall, not wanting to fall on you while you kiss up at me, grabbing my cheeks.

The continuous moans you make are those that invite me to continue, teasing.

Your teeth show, you smile when I slip in.
You win.
I trip in.

The door is closed loudly behind me.
My disguise is gone.
I'm in your room, in your arms.

"When do you have to be back to the dorm?" you ask giggling in between kisses that I give.

I grunt, nipping your lips again. "Not yet, not yet."

I laugh when you laugh.
I kiss when you kiss.
I hit the bed to hover when you hit the bed to lay.