Always a Sickness

Chapter One

Why do people love if there's a 50/50 chance of not being loved back. The answer to that is not because it's the way we live, the answer is we're attracted to that person and we can't ever stop how we feel even if we don't know what we feel.
There is still one more question I need answered, who was Nick working for, I knew they would still be looking for me and I knew that I was going to get out of this alive and they weren't.

Four months later.

The air was cold as it brushed up against my skin, the ground was full of slush from the rain mixed with snow. Every step I took I almost slipped, I turned the corner and almost ran into Blake.
" sorry " I smiled.
" it's fine, but why are you running? " he asked.
" needed some fresh air before work " I said.
" oh yeah work " he sighed.
" well that's what we get for try to teach kids how to love " I smiled.
" want to walk to work together? " he asked.
" yeah sure " I smiled.
We started to walk down the dim streets.
" so have you talked to Trevor? " he asked.
" no not yet, we're still trying to figure everything out " I sighed.
" you should probably talk to him, I know he wants to talk to you " he smiled.
" i'll try and talk to him today " I sighed.
" that's a good idea " he smiled as we walked into the White Flower.
Everyone sat around a long desk as I stood at the front of the room.
" so how are we going to teach these kids to love? " a man asked.
" well, by going into classes once a week we teach kid about love and how it's good and will increase the chances of more love being spread " I smiled.
" how will we get all the kids out of The Hole? " a women asked.
" well once a day or a we can send truck and buses to pick up 30 kids starting with the kids who have been in there the longest to the kids who have been in the shortest " I said.
Someone mumbled something in the corner.
" what was that? " I asked.
" just you can't even feel love so how should we trust you that all of this will really work? " he asked.
" because, i've learned about love, i've been in The Hole and spent a month with people who love and i've been attracted to someone have you ever been in love ? " I asked raising my eyebrows.
Quinn stood up in front of me, " I think that's enough questions for today, thank you " she smiled.
" thank you " I whispered before leaving the room to go stand in the hallway.
I sat down on the bench outside the door.
" good job answering those questions " I looked up to see Trevor standing there.
" thanks " I gave a small smile.
" can we go talk somewhere? " I asked.
" i'd love that " he smiled.
We started to walk down the street till we reached the small coffee shop on the corner, Ello's Cafe.
We grabbed a table and sat down.
" so what have you been up too? " he asked.
" work, i've been taking runs a lot to just think, Blake has been hangout at the house a lot because him and my brother are best friends " I sighed.
" what about you? " I asked.
" Nick and I are getting close again " he said.
" that's good " I said.
We sat in silence for a minute.
" i'm sorry for what happened " I said.
" it's ok, I understand " he gave me a small smile.
" no it's not ok, I should have just taken a breath for one day, but I didn't and things got crazy " I said.
" Vivian, it's fine, i'm not mad " he paused and grabbed my hands.
" I miss you, I miss having you around, I hate that we can't be together " he said.
" I hate it to, but- " I stopped talking.
" it's what had to happen, we couldn't be together anymore, it just wasn't working " I sighed moving my hands away.
" I should get going " I got up and walked out of the cafe.
As I was walking away I stopped to look threw the window at Trevor who was still sitting there.
The memory came back to my head of how we ended things, it was sad that he still didn't know the full story, but I couldn't tell him, it would hurt him even more.

" I saved your friends lives so now you have to do this " Nick said.
" I saved their lives, I stopped you " I said.
" you don't have a choice your not good for him, Vivian break up with him or I will for you " Nick said.

I continued to walk down the street it was only three, the day was yet to be finished.
I walked threw the door to see my brother and Blake sitting on the couch, Blake basically lived with us now, he didn't want to go back to his dad so my aunt welcomed him into the family.
I walked into the kitchen and grabbed out a pop.
" where's Aunt Tilly? " I asked.
" she went out " Jack said well keeping his eyes on the t.v.
I sat down on one of the island chairs and just looked at the wall.
Quinn and Winny had bought a house a couple blocks away from mine, last month Quinn took her dad to court and now has custody of her sister Lucy and her dad is in jail.
I still know nothing about Winnys family, i'm pretty sure she's an only child and her parents got taken away or something like that.
Leila and Samuel lived two streets away from the White Flower, Leila and Samuel always have everyone over for dinner every other friday.
Trevor and Nick live together and like Trevor said there getting closer, probably because i'm not there.
I was finally 16, my aunt didn't want me to go back to school she wanted me to stay at home and be homeschooled so I could focus on work and help change the worlds view on love and so far it was working.
I still find it crazy how just a couple months ago I was 15 and was stuck in an impossible situation.
Blake and Jack both yelled at the tv.
" what happened? " I asked.
" we lost " Blake sighed.
" don't you have a new assignment you should be starting? " Jack asked.
" shit, yeah I do " I ran into my room and slid into my desk chair to open up my computer.
I checked my emails and found my new assignment to start which was due in a month.
Blake leaned in the doorway.
" what's a assignment? " he asked walking over and sitting down on my bed.
" I have to find out about my parents, I have to do a family tree with facts about each of them " I turned to look at him.
" talk to your aunt about it " he suggested.
" i've tried a long time ago, it didn't go over well " I sighed.
" well you already know they were taken away start from there, you never know they could still be alive " Blake smirked before leaving the room.
I looked back at my computer and sighed.

My aunt was finally home, she sat down on the couch.
" so " I said sitting down beside her.
" what do you want? " she asked.
" who says I want something " I smiled.
" you do, know what is it " she put the tv on mute.
" I have to do an assignment on my family tree, I need to know about my mom and dad, I know a little bit, but not a lot " I said.
She let out a big sigh.
" your mother was a wonderful women, but your father on the other hand was not so, in the first closet on the to shelf there should be photos and notebooks, you can find whatever you need there ok " she smiled.
" thank you " I smiled.

I got the box down, I brought it into my room and sat down on my bed.
" what are you doing? " Jack asked.
" looking at old photos " I smiled.
" well have fun with that, i'm going to go to bed " he sighed before walking down the hallway.
I opened the box, photos, notes everything. I pulled out a photo of my mom sitting in the hospital, my brother on her right and my dad on her left, and me in her arms.
I flipped the card over, a note sat on the back.
And now there were 5.
Five? There weren't five people in this photo.