The Moment I Fall For You

105 - Don't need a marriage without love

Today I am very much prepared for a romantic night with siddarth. My heart was pounding crazily because I am taking the initiative and siddarth doesn't even have any clue about this.  By keeping everything in my mind that doctor advised me I waited for him at our room. At first I thought to change into something sexy nightwear but I don't have any and also if all of sudden I began to wear something like that siddarth will definitely put me in some asylum.  So I remained in my jeans and a pink top. I have already bathe and put some pinky lip gloss and some light scented scent in my neck and wrist. I kept some vanilla scented candles at side table of our bed. It took three hours for me to search and gather all these informations from internet that how to make sex more  romantic and  how to increase your partner's mood. I  have even practiced some erotic lines to say before our foreplay.

Time was already past 9 still he didn't come. I was waiting for him to have our dinner together but I think he's going to be very late. I wanted to try his phone but felt little awkward. This is my another problem now . I can't talk to Siddarth like before not even through phone. Before even if it was a fight I  never felt such feelings then why this is happening now?  By past 10 he came and I insisted to have dinner before moving to the room. He accepted my request and sit beside me. I also turned my plate to have dinner and Ganga served  us.

" You still hadn't your dinner ? " He asked me what his furrowed eyebrows.

" No , I am going to have it . I was waiting for you " I said while taking a small piece from roti.

"Nivedita how many times I told you ? You don't have to wait for me . I will be very busy on these coming days so it's better you have dinner on time and go to bed early " he said with a serious tone.

There was something problem because his face was bit dark and the way he talked to me was also bit harsh. Even during the dinner he doesn't utter a word after finishing it he went straight towards his room and I followed him. He don't even noticed the special aroma inside the room and the little changes on me all he did after entering into room was took a quick shower and changed into a track pants and a T shirt then  again sit infront of his laptop .

" Siddarth are you not going to sleep?"
I asked while standing infront of him.

" No I have some important work left. You can sleep don't wait for me " he said without taking his gaze from laptop screen.

I went towards the bed in a bit annoying way and started to read a book I decided to wait for him.

Sid's pov

When I enter into the house Nivi was waiting for me and she seems different. During the time of dinner also sometimes her hands touched me initially I thought it was accidental but no she was purposely doing it. When I entered the room it smells really good . Nivedita seems really restless and was moving behind me. After finishing my work I got into the bed but Nivi was still waiting for me without sleeping and time was already 12 am.

" Nivi if you want to say anything then please go ahead . You don't have to behave like this. " I said while standing beside my bed.

She stood from bed and looked down.

" Siddarth before many times we tried to get indimate but failed because of me. I may not be a perfect wife for you but still I wanted to play my role as wife by all means . So.." she wasn't even looking at me. But I got it what she was upto . With shaking legs and shivering body she moved towards me but I stopped her.

"Are you really sure about this ? "I asked with pulling a long face.

Nivi shook her head and stood there.

" So you don't have any problem that I am touching you. " I asked him.

"Yes I don't have any problem.  " She replied.

" You really don't feel uncomfortable if I am close to you" I asked with a husky seductive sound and again took some  steps forward. Nivedita didn't budge but she gulped a lump from her throat.

" Are you really fine if I kiss you even without your consent " this time I was really close to her and put my lips into the nape of her neck but I didn't kiss her instead  I gave a hot blow. For which she took two steps back with her shivering body and this was what I wanted to check .

I sarcastically smrinked at her and moved towards my bed without saying anything.

" Siddarth , I am sorry we can try it for ...." She began to give me the explanation which I don't want to hear  now. With my all anger suppressed inside I turned back to her.

"What we are going to try again Nivedita ? I am not a sex starved man. How I can be with a girl said to be my wife who will take 2 steps back if her husband take a single step forward. Do you really think  after what I saw here now I will be in a mood to be with you. " I was not Angry at her but I was annoyed by her reaction.

" Siddarth I am trying my best but.."  I cut off her talk

" Ya you are trying your best from the day we came back from Delhi still you are trying. But I am disappointed in you Nivedita not because you are not sleeping with me don't even think like that. Nivedita listen to me very carefully i want you , I need you but that's not your body I want your heart ,  I want you to love me , like me. The day you start to love me and feel care for me that day we will be together till then don't do anything stupid like this. " That was my last words or can be called as my feelings after that I get back to my bed and slept and Nivedita slept on couch.

Whatever I said was true I wanted Nivedita to love me without love there is no future for our relationship it will only become a burden. When I touch her I want to see her love and lust for me in her eyes .  I want to make love with her only when she is completely ready for it . Whatever she was trying to do now was only to satisfy me or was trying to fullfill her responsibilities. I hope she will began to realise her love  for me and willingly she come back to my side.