AN AFFAIR TO DIE FOR

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"AUDRIANA, I WANT you to put Jackson to bed," Jae spoke in limited words, his voice dangerously soft.

"Jae, I-."

"Now."

"Come on, tesoro, let's get you to bed."

"But Mama," Jackson protested, tugging at the hem of her skirt, "I want to-."

"I don't want to tell you again, Jackson. Listen to your Eomeoni." Jae's voice was cutting as he poured himself a glass of wine, rolling up the sleeves of his polo neck shirt.

Putting Jackson to bed on any ordinary evening was difficult enough, but doing so on Christmas Eve was even more so. He struggled against his pyjamas until he caught sight of the split second fear in his mother's eyes as she begged him to be quiet.

"Mama," he asked as he fumbled under his blanket for his favourite plush toy, Sully from Monsters Inc. "Why was Uncle Ricky kissing you?" The question was so innocent that Audriana felt herself tearing up at the sight of him. "Can you love more than one person?"

"Of course you can, baby. I love you, and Daddy and Uncle Frankie-."

"And Uncle Ricky?"

Audriana hesitated, the taste of him, cigarette smoke and soap, lingered on her lips. "And Uncle Ricky, yes tesoro." She whispered, leaning forwards to kiss his forehead. "Goodnight, baby."

"Goodnight, Mama. Ti amo."

▬ ▬ ▬

Audriana tread cautiously down the stairs, following Jae's voice that called he was in the office. When she reached it, the cracked wine bottle, empty glasses and stained cashmere rug should've sent warning bells.

"I think you should stop drinking." She offered softly, slipping an arm around his waist as she reached for a bottle and its remaining dregs.

But Jae turned around suddenly, his fingers wrapped around her slender neck sent her arms flailing, as he pushed her roughly against the wall.

"Jae," she gasped, trying to peel off his fingers.

"How could you?" He hissed, voice slurred. "How could you, Audriana?"

"Jae stop, you're hurting me!" She cried the words, high pitched and hysterical as he shook her.

"This doesn't amount to a fucking fraction of what I'm feeling! In front of everybody too? I never took you for a whore-."

"Jae!"

He released her as she gulped for air, banging his fist on the table and sending loose sheets fluttering into the air. "Its never been just you and I. It's always fucking been us and then that third wheeling prick."

"That's not true. That's not true and you know it! I've never been anything but loyal to you, Jae-."

To call Jae's next move a mere slap would've been an understatement, the sound of his fist impacting with Audriana's otherwise pristine features sent her reeling into the bookshelf.

At first, there was a guilt, drowning him in cold waves of culpability, but then he realised how much he enjoyed the sound of his taut knuckles against her tanned skin. He enjoyed the whimpers that left her sweet, sweet mouth, arousing him unashamedly.

With every hit, he felt an alluring shot of adrenaline he soon realised he couldn't get from any other source. Jae hit her twice, once on the right cheek followed by one straight punch to the face. Audriana stumbled back, blood rushing from her nose, her words stuck in her throat.

Jae reached her in one quick, long step. "Shhh, Audriana, shh. Just let it happen. Let it happen, baby." His voice was brutal against her ear as he reached for the hem of her dress, tearing at it with a severe ferocity. He was oblivious to her cries as she struggled to crawl away from him, grazing her elbows as she fell face first on the floor.

"Jae." Her words were inaudible, blurred with vicious tears as she kicked at his arm roughly. She hadn't expected him to be so strong, his grip tight around her lean shin.

Then came the emotional pain and regret, all too suddenly. It flashed across Jae's eyes as he buried his head in his arms, stepping away from her with a sob that racked his entire body.

Audriana's body automatically slid down against the wall, until she was sat in the corner of the room, gasping for air. She pressed her hand against her profusely bleeding nose, eyes closed in effort to mask the pain.

"Go to bed, Audrey. I'm coming."

She looked up in contempt, recoiling from his outstretched fingertips, staring past his narrowed eyes, hazy with alcohol.

"Let me help you up. Please Audrey, let me help you."

"No." She said hoarsely, pushing herself up. He caught her eyes flick to the phone on its stand, and before she could reach it, he yanked it back from the cord with enough power to crash it into the wall.

"Don't." He warned, pointing a finger aggressively, his tears drying up as quickly as they had appeared. "Don't even fucking think about it. Don't betray me again tonight."

Audriana didn't respond, her legs wobbling as she climbed the stairs. She caught sight of him at the sink, humming quietly to himself as he rolled his sleeves up and washed the blood, her blood, off his hands.

It was well after midnight when Jae came upstairs, slipping his shirt off, leaving the lamp turned off so as to not disrupt her sleep. The mattress creaked under the weight of his muscle, and Audriana inconspicuously clamped a hand over her mouth to silence her cries. Her face still stung from the ghost of his hits, the impact already swelling the area around her eyes.

Audriana held her breath when she felt his bare skin against her loose shirt, his arms curling around her waist,  mouth hot against her shoulder. She knew that he was aware she was awake, his hands slinking under the material of her shirt, fingertips running across the curve of her breasts.

"I'm sorry." His words were soft, his lips parting against the soft skin of her ear. "Audrey, I'm so sorry. That wasn't me, you know that, right? That wasn't me." His hand rose to her hair, tucking the brunette strands behind her lobe.

Audriana kept her mouth closed, her body rigid as his fingers snaked down her thighs, then past the waistband of her underwear. Black lace, Jae's favourite. She'd worn them because she'd expected the party to end the way it always did- with the rough sex reminiscent of their first few weeks together.

He felt her thighs clamp shut and she heard the clear sigh of irritation.

"Jae, I want you to stop."

"Audrey," she was bewildered at how he had the audacity to sound upset, "I said I was sorry."

Audriana cleared her throat. "I want you to stop." She felt his fingers slip out from under her robe and he got off the bed aggressively, pulling his shirt on.

"Where are you going?" The words were strangled as she sat up, fumbling for the bedside lamp. "Jae, where are you going?"

He refused to answer her and moments later she heard the front door slam shut, and saw the rolling headlights from their Jeep SUV paint the ceiling a burning orange.

Audriana stood slowly, her head spinning, before making her way down the hallway. Usually, she enjoyed having an elaborate corridor, but in times like this, the sheer eeriness taunted her. She gently pushed open the door to Jackson's room, melting at the sight of his small, chubby body curled up in a ball. He stirred from the light entering his room, rubbing his eyes with fatigue.

"Mama?"

"Hi baby, Mama's going to sleep with you tonight. Is that okay?" Jackson nodded, turning over on his side despite how tired he was, to allow her sufficient space to sleep.

"Ti amo, my favourite boy."

But despite her words, Audriana's body racked with low, fierce sobs and she gently pulled Jackson closer to her chest. She hadn't expected the strength behind Jae's punches, and the sheer pressure of his hand wrapped around her throat lingered like the aftermath of a nightmare.