How's life

Welcome to hell

Hey, writer here I just want to put a few warning up first. Anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, GAYNESSS, and abusive nature, also this character doesn't have scitzo I tried to do that the last time I published this but it hit too close to home. Leave me alone I'm angsty. If you're reading my Eddsworld fic, yes I'm still continuing it wait till the weekend impatient readers love you all. Also this won't just be a story there will probably vents and me asking for advice cuz I suck at this thing I like to call life.
- Danny

That was important so read it 👆🏻

Please

Danny's POV
          I woke up to the sound of nothing, nothing that actually exists. Nightmares usually wake me up before my alarm can. I've always had problems sleeping, insomnia, nightmares, and sometimes I refuse to sleep because I don't want to experience nightmares.

           It's just stuff in my head I don't know why it always keeps me up, it sucks ass. I fiddled with the black ring on the cartilage of my ear, and thumped my finger against my bed frame to the tune of a song I remembered.
I'm semi automatic
My prayers schizophrenic....
            

            The thumping stopped due to me not knowing the words. I sat in my bed in my pajamas. Also known as a shirt and short shorts cuz I'm too lazy to put anything on related to pajamas. My short hair spread across my pillow making my body look like a sunflower. I assume. it's not like I had mirrors on my ceiling.

... and suddenly I was stabbed by the silence stabbed I mean stabbed. Blood gushed from my stomach pooling across my white bed sheets staining the once perfect scenery I was sitting in...

I shot up from my bed panting heavily, my hands shot to my stomach no blood, no knife. Thank god. Not really, suddenly dying slowly isn't how I want to go. A gun shot would be quick and painless.

            I snarled hopping out of my bed, pulling on my school clothes/only clothes, and headed,to the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee. Grumbling curses for no reason other reason than the fact that I hate life. My personal favorite of the nightmares dreams is when a rainbow crushes my entire family. Almost as if I would crush them if they knew I was a gay man. Or a man at all! (The italic text is pretty much specific thoughts I remember)

            I continued to shuffle to the kitchen like a zombie limping down a street towards a humans functioning body and beating heart... maybe I am a zombie? My parents always tell me to be happier. In fact I can still here their requests echoing in my head. "Buck up Ann (my birth given name) give us a smile," yeah right, I hardly smile when good things even happen, which isn't often.

           I grabbed a bag of coffee beans and carefully measured out enough to make a pot of coffee. "No coffee unless you make enough for everyone!" My mothers commands pounded into my head. I swear even remembering her voice gives me a headache. I'm surprised we can afford a coffee machine. My family isn't rich we spent most of our money on buying enough computers to satisfy my dads need for video games. Which is probably why I only have one outfit to wear throughout the school year... great! I assume we would be fine financially if we didn't constantly buy electronics for my father and mother, while their children often went without lunch and breakfast. I'm not complaining though I usually don't eat either. We weren't always in a bad financial situation though.