Taking Your Love Hostage

Chapter 20: 'Bruised and Shaken'

Emily

     The week that I went through was hard. It may have only been a week, and I realize in retrospect that isn't as long of a time as many other's hostages were taken for. I recall hearing about one where the girl had been taken for years, and in that time had been forced to bear the children of her attacker. You see, my story could have been far worse. I could have been a rape victim, or abused so badly that I was badly disfigured for the rest of my life. However, I had gotten out of mine without of these things. The part that I did get was the nightmares. The constant paranoia that someone was after me, that Chase would pop out of nowhere at any second and that maybe this time I wouldn't be found. That I would be forced to live out a life with him, one where I had to play that I loved him just to stay alive and hope against hope that maybe somehow I would be able to get out of it. The other thing that constantly bothered me was what if he didn't come back to kidnap me all over again. I'm not saying that I wanted him to kidnap me because I particularly enjoyed it, I'm saying what if he came back to kill me? My days after being held hostage were spent like this.

     I would sit up in bed and contemplate these things, double and triple checking the locks on my bedroom window to insure that Chase wouldn't be getting in through there. All of this precaution wouldn't really help me though. If Chase wanted to get me he could, and more than likely would. He could grab me when I was walking to my car, or if I was going to check the mail. These constant thoughts haunted me and were the main advocates in my staying inside the house at all times. My parent's were no where near as worried as they had been when I was gone, but they were worried about me none the less. How could you comfort the ones you loved after something like that had happened to one of the ones that they loved? All of our lives were changed, and I'm not sure whose was changed the most. Then there was Daniel, who I had been ignoring, but I'll get to that in a moment. He showed up at my house everyday, often multiple times a day to try and check on me. He woud continually recieve the "She's okay, Daniel. She just needs some time and space. She's not quiet ready to be around anyone just yet." He had been apart of this too and here I sat shutting him out.

     Daniel was worried sick about me during my kidnapping, he was worried now too. The thing that bothered me the most was that I could do nothing for him to lessen the worry. I'm sure some would say that I could simply let him and come and see me and it would help. I couldn't do that though. I was saving Daniel. Saving him from what I knew I had become. I was only a shadow of myself now and he deserved so much more. He shouldn't have to put up with my psychotic outbursts where I thought I saw Chase around a corner, or when I unexpectedly burst into sobs that wracked through my entire body because something reminded me of all that I had gone through. More importantly he shouldn't have to deal with the nightmares. Those were the worst part to me and quite frankly I thought they were made me the most crazy. My nightmares consisted of me replaying the scenes of that room in Chase's house. I could almost smell the cologne he wore as he leaned down to kiss me in those dreams and it sent a shiver down my back just thinking about it. I would wake up from these nightmares with sweat rolling down my back and making me stick to my sheets, which were wrapped around me, and a strangled cry coming from somewhere deep in my chest. This was normally the part where my parent's came bursting through my door.

     This was why I was ignoring Daniel. I couldn't put him through this. Through living with me. I had to ignore him because I knew what kind of person that he was and knew that he would try to put up with me. He didn't deserve someone as bruised and shaken as I was, in every sense of the words. I knew that he deserved better. 

     "Emily, Daniel's here to see you... Again." I hadn't heard my mom enter my room and quickly scrambled against my headboard before realizing it was her. The look that flitted across her face broke my heart, though. I knew that she was beyond sick with worry and I only worsened it for her when I acted like a crazy person.

       "I don't want to see him." She didn't understand my insistance on not seeing Daniel, but I didn't feel like explaining.

      "I know that, but he said he's not leaving until you do see him. I think he's pretty serious about it this time too. Maybe you could just talk for a few minutes and then I can come get him and make some excuse why he has to go home."

        "No, mom. I just don't want to see him."

          "Well, I'm letting him in. It will do you good to see someone that you care about besides your dad and me. You can't live in this room forever, Emily. This is taking baby steps." I knew that she was right. Oh I wanted to explain the reasons why I couldn't see Daniel but I knew that they would only hurt her even more. I'd caused her enough pain over the past few weeks, and I couldn't make her feel like she hadn't done enough or that she was wrong for something. This was all on me. I couldn't make her take anymore of the load, because honestly she was already bearing too much.

       "Alright. Only a few minutes and then you'll come and get him?"

        "Yes, baby girl. I will." Her face had lit up almost animatedly. It felt good to do something that didn't cause her pain for once lately.

        I sat in my room and waited. I contemplated what I could say. What could make him realize that he should give up. If I acted crazy would it make him think "To heck with this chick! I'll find someone else." I highly doubted it would since Daniel was a little crazy too. He'd probably seen far more than I could ever throw at him. I honestly had nothing other than telling him the truth, and I knew I couldn't do that either because that would probably only further his want to stay with me. Maybe if I was just really quiet he would get the point. The silent treatment was oldschool and trivial but it was my best plan at this moment. As the sounds of footsteps came up the stairs I felt my heart pick up rapidly in my chest before I realized it would be my mom and Daniel. Crazy and pararnoid were the good adjectives to describe me. I dreaded every second as I heard the footsteps come closer and closer and then finally they stopped and I knew that they were at the door. The sound of the door knob turning was my last moment to prepare before it swung open.

      There stood Daniel. As gorgeous as he had ever been. I quickly looked over his face, noticing the sexy unkemptness of his hair, the strong line of his jaw, and the soft curve of his god like lips. Then I noted with dissatisfaction the stubble along his jaw, which would have been sexy had it not been paired with the dark circles under his eyes which were rimmed in red. Daniel was still hot, but instead of his usually glorious hotness he looked more like a tortured soul. A rock and roller who had seen too much in his life. He was like this because of me. Everything that I touched only seemed to hurt, lately. I was the root of all of this. I had never seen Daniel look like this a day in his life before now. Before what had happened. I saw the same change in my mom. The way her cheeks were suddenly a little more sunken in, or that my dad's eyes were always rimmed in red and that often I would look at him and see a hardness that hadn't been there before the kidnapping. Of course they would soften once he noticed me looking but the fact was still there. I had caused all of this pain to the people that I loved more than anything else in this world. I was more than likely about to cause more too.

Hey you guys! Sorry it's been so long and that this one is kind of short but notice how it no longer says 'on hold'? Yep, that's right! I'm back... Hopefully (; lol. I hope you all liked this though it is mostly an inner monologue of Emily and how she is feeling and the thoughts running through her head. Also, I think that the rest of the story is going to be through just Emily's perspective. Do you guys like the idea or nah? You mad or nah? Hopefully nah! (: Well, please please comment your feelings even if it's just to tell me you hate me for taking so long. Did you like this chapter? If you did, please vote for it! It greatly helps me! Also, recommend it to others and tell them to vote. Peer pressure here people, come on! Anyways! I love you all, thank you so much! Please vote, comment, fan, message me! <3 Bye lovies.