Crown Me

9.

"An ultrasound will determine if there might be an underlying cause for your bleeding," he continued. "It could be the placement of the placenta or minor breakthrough bleeding that you misinterpreted. We can perform the ultrasound now if you'd like."

Jade should be here. The thought was almost out of my mouth before I swallowed it back. A baby was the last thing that she needed to worry about. I pushed away the painful realisation that this wasn't good news. Not only was it the last thing she needed to worry about but it was also the last thing that she wanted.

"Would you like to wait for your fiancé?" he asked as if he could read my thoughts.

I shook my head. "No, I don't want to cause her more stress."

And I couldn't wait. I needed answers. I needed something concrete to prove to me that this wasn't all a dream. Because at the moment I couldn't be certain I wasn't trapped in a nightmare.

"I'll send for a machine," the doctor said.

"I can go to the machine," I offered. The thought of sitting here, plugged in to tubes and monitors while waiting for answers was too much to bear.

"Given today's events, it would be better if we brought it to you," the doctor suggested gently. "I can only imagine that you'd like to keep this quiet until you've had a chance to speak with Jade and your family Perrie."

My family. I'd have to tell them. I'd have to face them and explain that all of today's terrible events that had happened because of me. I'd have to tell them why Zayn had attacked the wedding. I'd have to explain that I'd known about the threat. Then I'd have to tell them I was pregnant.

I'd have to tell Jade.

And then I'd have to face the fallout.

I'd lose all of them. Maybe that was for the best. Being close to me was dangerous. The hand on my stomach wrapped protectively around my hip as if I could cage my unborn child and protect them.

But the person they needed to be protected from was me.

The doctor stood to leave and I caught his arm. "My friend, Jessica Nelson. She must be here still."

He looked to the nurse, who nodded.

"She's in the waiting room," The nurse informed me. "Would you like me to deliver a message?"

"No" I shook my head "I'd like her to be here. Could you get her for me?"

"Of course Miss Edwards."

Time stood still while I waited for her to return with Jesy. The only movement in the room was the blinking line on the heart rate monitor but my eyes were glued to the hand over my stomach. It was impossible. Even as my memory provided more and more evidence to the contrary, I couldn't believe it.

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Jesy flew into the room, stopping short of my bed and pointing shakily at me.

"Thank God you're alright because I plan to kill you! I cannot handle any more of this craziness Perrie."

"Then you better sit down," I said softly, patting the side of my hospital bed.

She did so reluctantly, her eyes trained on me as if any moment I might faint again.

"The doctor said you were okay." There was a note of accusation in her tone, resentment at being lied to.

"I'm pregnant." I forced the words out, desperately needing to say it and wanting to hold it inside at the same time.

"Did...what? Huh?" Jesy fumbled for words, her eyes darting from me to the nurse and back again. "Did you know?"