Waiting for Your Smile

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Captain's POV

P'White was too drunk to get in the car by himself that night, i had to carry him to the basement where i park my car. I piggybag him and he was heavier than i thought. I carried him before but i think he gained some weight now.

"Uuhhhh...i don't wanna come hooommmeee....i wanna staaayyy heree with yooouuu..." He said drunkenly. He's one of the worst drunkard that i know. He can do the silliest thing when he's drunk.

I put him down to open the car, but he walk away from me and heading to another car. "P'! My car's over here!" I shake my head and drag him by the wrist.

"No no no..this one's your car, Noh.."

"P'! Here, come heeereeee.." I stubbornly hold into his wrist while i open the door. Then i feel him snaking his hand around my waist. He leaned his head to my head, his breath smells of alcohol.

"Noh, can i see you everyday? I miss you when you're not with me." He said, sleepily. I sigh. He's drunk. That's why he can say that. I mean he's a very manly man, though it seems like he has a very friendly behaviour but he actually has this aura of impenetrable masculinity.

"Ofcourse, P'. But you're so busy with your schedule, right?" The next thing i know, he flipped me so he face me against the car and caged me between his arms.

"You idiot little bastard. Didn't i tell you that i have a feeling for you? It feels so funny you know, my...my...heart hurts right heeeereeee, when i think about yoouuu..." He place my hand to his left chest.

Thump-thump-thump...my heart's going crazy again as our bodies getting closer. So loud it hurts. I shove him away. He will regret it if he knows what he's doing now so i prevents whatever he was going to do.

Thump-thump-thump...His eyes are looking at me, dimly, so close that i can see my own reflection, and he slumped to me as he's losing balance, but not before he said," Earth calling to angel...will he come down from the heaven?" And he fell into a deep slumber.

Damn him. I really hate him now. He make me feel something i shouldn't have, something i always hide well since we first met. Because we can't be like Phun and Noh. We can't be like normal people. We can't love who other people don't love. Because we are celebs, that simple.

Just holding him in a silence like this is enough. Taking care of him is enough for me. To be allowed to have a conversation with him in private like this is like winning a lottery. And to be in the same project with him is one of my dreams. For the time being i wasn't allowed to be in the same project with him, let alone to be a couple because our management want to change our image. We are the most shipped couple in this industry despite we're both males, and the management thought it's bad for our future jobs.

I took him to his house, and his Ma forced me to stay since i live far away from his house. It's already past midnight and it's not save to drive home, she said. So i helped him to his room and try to bathe him.

I said i try. Because it's so hard to move him now since he's asleep and i have to take his clothes off. Can i cut it with scissor instead? No, just a joke. Truth is i can't stand to take his clothes off. My hands shakes and seems to lose strength with every clothes i shed.

And there he is, laying helpless sprawled on the bed. Geez, he actually has a milky white skin just like i do but with golden reflection. I close my eyes and just carry him to the shower. But he's still in the boxer and that's when i lost my mind. What do i have to do with the boxer? Dang!

I feverishly took off his boxer and tried to not look at anything down below, but it was impossible. I have to wash him too, don't i? Fuuckkk..

I groggily open my eyes and realize that he was *cough* quite...big...

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