Dear Emmett

Chapter One - [Spilled Breakfast & Spilled Secrets.]

The best part about being in a big city is the ability to hide.

As I sat in some mom and pop cafe in downtown Los Angeles, I was grateful for just that. Nobody knew who I was, and nobody was bothering to ask. They were too busy immersed in their own lives to notice the seventeen year old girl in the corner, skipping school.

But I couldn't go to school. Not today. I wasn't sure I could handle it. I needed to be somewhere away, where I could just disappear into the crowd. Or just disappear.

I swallowed the lump in my throat, hoping the tears wouldn't come back.

I'd always been one of those “That will never happen to me” people. And it wasn't because I was sleeping around, hoping it wouldn't happen to me. I'd been a virgin, too cautious and too careful to let it happen.

What about him had made me...

“Hey, do you want another drink or what?”

I looked up at the barista as he stared at me, an irritated expression on his face. I hadn't even noticed he'd been trying to talk to me, I was so lost in my own thoughts.

“Uh...Yeah, yeah. Please,” I said, pushing the empty cup towards him. He glared at me, snatching his cup up and turning away as he muttered something about “stupid kids these days.”

Normally, his comment would have offended me. But I just didn't have the energy to care. He came back with a second hot chocolate, setting it down in front of me with a huff.

“Thank you,” I said quietly.

Where are you?

The IM popped up on my Facebook profile. It was from my best friend, Katie. I hadn't told her I was skipping and I hadn't told her why. Nobody knew I was pregnant. I could hardly handle the news myself. How could I tell somebody else?

So I lied to her. I had to lie to her, and I hoped that she would understand.

Dentist appointment. Ugh.

It took a second for her to read it, and then the little icon came up that told me she was typing back a response. My heart thumped wildly, hoping she'd believe it. We didn't lie to each other – ever. If it had been in person, I never would have been able to pull it off.

Okay. See you tomorrow?

I let out a sigh of relief, a small weight lifted off of my shoulders. I knew I'd have to tell her eventually. But this gave me just a little bit of time. I wondered vaguely how long it would take before I started...showing.

The tears welled in my eyes again. The walls seemed to be closing in on me. There was too much chatter. Too many people. My chest tightened, panic setting in.

People wouldn't bug me if I was just sitting here, blending in but if I started crying I knew it would probably cause a scene. I quickly shut my laptop and put it in my messenger bag, and tossed a twenty on the table for my lunch and the two drinks I'd had.

Hurrying out of the cafe, I managed to bump into more than one person on my way out. I heard a few muttered curse words behind me, but I didn't care.

When I made it to the less crowded sidewalk, I took in a breath of fresh air.

“Shit,” I muttered, shaking my head. What in the world was I going to do? “Shit.”

“Hey, lady, there's kids around!”

A mother holding her young sons hand glared at me as she spoke over her shoulder. She shook her head, and walked a little bit faster away from me. I looked at her son.