Chapter 24: Helplessly Helpless

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John's POV

"What did I do wrong?" John stared helplessly after Angelica's retreating form.

Eliza just burst into tears and grabbed him, hugging the life out of him.

"MY SISTER WON'T BE A WIDOW!" Eliza rejoiced.

"Uh, yeah, I'll live to see my kid," John added.

Alex had tears in his eyes.

"Bro, you crying for me?" John punched Alex playfully.

"Pshhaw, these are manly tears, which you know nothing of," Alex nonetheless did a 'bro hug' with John.

Eliza whipped out her phone.

Group Chat.

You: He's alive, he's alive, omg, guys, he's alive! The doctors did some random miracle and HES ALIVE

YellowSis: WOWOWOWOWOWOW 

MyHalf-BrothersGirlfriend: STOP PLAYING JOKES ON US, ITS NOT FUNNY ELIZABETH, MY BROTHER IS DEAD, OKAY!

You: Srsly HE CAME BACK AND LIKE HES GONNA BE DISCHARGED SOON

LittleJohnnyBoy: IM BACK GUYS IM BACK ILY ALL!

Twin1: THE GHOST OF JOHN WHAAAAAAAT

Twin2: I'd say I'm happy, but having no 'dad' was pretty good

YellowSis: I think that's the way you lowkey say I miss you 

MyHalf-BrothersGirlfriend: AGHGHGHGHGH JOHN YOU CAME BACK FOR US

MyHalf-Brother: Yooo, bro! I needed a brother in law that wasn't Alex, ya know? He's boring!

LittleJohnnyBoy: wut, Alex is greaaat he even cried for me his "manly tears"

Twin1: Originally I'd say, ship it, but, like, Laurgelica for the win, right? 

HammyHamDaHam: JOHN THEY WERE MANLY I SWEAR ALSO YES I SHIP THAT LAURGELICA

RedSis: Hey, where's Angie???????? Shouldn't she be rejoicing and stuff? I mean, I am... And ya know, she's ur wife, basically man. 

You: Bathroom, she was really happy tho ALSO SHES CARRYING HIS BABY

RedSis: Bathroom? Where she's spending all her time these weeks? WAIT WTH IM DECeASED HELP??

LargeBaguette: ANGIE'S PREGNANT?!

LittleJohnnyBoy: WAT NO WAIT IS SHE

HorseGuy: DANNNNNNNNNNNNNNG ALREADY? THOUGHT U'D WAIT FOR MARRIAGE?

LittleJohnnyBoy: Herc shut up rn

LargeBaguette: Wow, just wow! 

LittleJohnnyBoy: YOU GUYS SHE'S NOT HAVING MY KID CHILL

HorseGuy: All the parents still in college, always in denial. Real shame. Babies are wonderful, tiny, little.... Er, creatures.

RedSis: tru Herc eloquently worded

HorseGuy: :)

LargeBaguette: HE USED EMOJIS!  MARIA IS BRINGING OUT A DIFFERENT SIDE TO HIM

LittleJohnnyBoy: Can we get back to the subject of my miracoulous recovery and stuff?

YellowSis: No

RedSis: No

LargeBageutte: No

You: No

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