The Edge of Everything

Chapter One

Rey's little giggle echoed through the house. I couldn't believe she's already two. I can't believe it's been three years since the worst night of my life. And yet even though circumstances could've been different, I got the greatest gift of all. My daughter.

Having a child out of wedlock is hard. But becoming pregnant as a result of assault is even harder. My pregnancy wasn't magical. It wasn't everyone touching my belly and asking me how excited I was to become a mother. It was filled with fear and indecision. Did I want my baby? The baby that could possibly remind me of the man who hurt me?

I knew I could never give her up. The day she was born she came kicking and screaming into this world. My heart snapped back together and I knew she was my daughter. She had my eyes, my golden hair. Cassian even said she had my fire, my stubborn will. She was perfect, not a trace of her father inside her. I felt guilty for thinking of giving her away.

Rey's giggles turned into squeals as I stood in the kitchen. I would've been worried If I hadn't heard his deep voice. He was always there, always a heartbeat away from us, helping and willing to offer a hand. I brought my cup of tea up to my mouth. I took a sip as he came walking into the kitchen. I was surprised he was awake this early and not heading to work.

Cassian wasn't a morning person. He was barely able to function without at least three cups of coffee.

He looked put together this morning. His dark hair was shorter, his dark eyes sparkled as he held my daughter in his arms. He was smiling, that was always my favorite sight to see. He smiled no matter what, his laughter had pulled me through the hardest days. He was wearing a black tee shirt that hugged the muscles on his arms. Maybe it was because he was holding my toddler, but something about him seemed different today.

He looked even better than I remembered.

"Nesta." Cassian greeted me with his lazy smile. He had Rey thrown over his shoulder. She was giggling like crazy, "have you seen Rey? I came to give her her birthday present."

I shook my head. If we hadn't been best friends since we were kids I would've gone crazy. He was my saving grace, the person who helped me the most during my darkest days. Hell he was the one there in the delivery room because Feyre was late to the hospital.

He was my best friend, my rock. He loved little Rey like his own.

"Actually I haven't seen her yet this morning. I'm thinking she wants to skip presents."

She wiggled in his big arms, her little legs kicking as she giggled louder, "no Ashian! Presents!"

She could never get his name right. But it was okay because he loved her version more. Her little lisp made it that much cuter. I set down my cup and walked around to him. I tickled her sides and she squealed even louder in his ear.

My eyes found his and I offered him a lazy smile this time, "give me my daughter."

He winked as he threw her back over his shoulder, catching her before she fell to the floor. She kept laughing, she loved rough housing with the boys. I shook my head as he finally handed me the little girl. She was tiny for a two year old. I picked her up and kissed her cheek, "happy birthday sweetheart," I smiled down at her as she hugged me.

"Mama," the first time she ever called me mama I melted. All the pain and sleepless nights had been more than worth it that day. Because it didn't matter how she became to be. All that mattered as that she was here. And she was mine. No one else had a claim to her.

I kissed her cheek as I set her back down and she started to dance around the room. I looked at my best friend, wondering if there was a purpose to this visit. Part of me feared he was going to ask me about dating another one of my friends. That had gone so well last week, "what are you doing up so early Cass?"