lost in the tide

t e a s e r

It's incredible to know that one day you know a person so extremely well then the next day that all disappears. That's exactly what happened with Easton and I. We had some troubles in the past but I never expected it would lead to the end of our era. He stopped talking to me for about a week, but came crawling back. We never officially got back together, but I know there was a spark between us. For months, we carried on this fake relationship that we hid from family and friends. It was all just low-key love. Somewhere in time, I became fooled by what I believed was love, but truly it was just a game. It was to the point that every time he saw me, all he wanted to do was get in bed with me and make "love". I just didn't know that love has different definitions. Love as in hooking up and love as in love. In the end Easton made of fool of me. He took advantage of my feelings and made me feel unworthy and less than any woman should ever feel. He used me. I became ignorant to the fact that boys are the same, and believe me I thought they were all different and that somewhere in this world there are some decent guys. But even the decent ones seem to rot. He fell in love, as in real love, with another girl and I noticed and closed my chapter in his life.

Many people tell me he truly did love me, but at some point that love turned into lust and my body became his temple for pleasure. I took this advice and completely turned it into something different. From this point on, I used my body to my own advantage to tempt the boys. To make them fall into heaven for just one night. I believed if I could appreciate my own body, boys would appreciate it just as much. and trust me from this point on

I don't understand love anymore....