Fade into Black ▸ sirius black

48. Frozen Blue

╔══════════════╗
No one warns little girls,
how boys with such pretty eyes
who smells like smoke,
who taste like rain,
who talk like silver,
are reasons behind
tear soaked pillows,
half finished poems
and so many sad dreams.

- Nikita Gill
╚══════════════╝

Chapter forty-eight.

The night before Christmas Eve, and I was certain that my ears soon would fall off if grandmother didn't stop persecute me everywhere I went. I hadn't had a moment in peace since she had arrived.

And Iona was, as usual, no good, since grandmother apparently still would pretend she didn't exist. It had been that way for years. I was the favourite grandchild, and Iona was nothing. I did feel bad for her when we were younger. When she still was my sister, but this Christmas I couldn't give a rat's as about how Iona felt.

But then I tried to remind myself of what Beth would have done, in a situation like this, and I succeeded to give Iona a vague smile at dinner. Her eyes turned dark at the sight, but I wanted her to know that someone saw her. Even though our grandmother didn't.

Mother had always explained her obvious hatred towards her with the reason that Iona reminded her too much of Icarus. The lost child. Grandmother had never accepted the fact that Icarus left her, and that there was nothing she could have done about it, and perhaps that was a good enough reason to push her second granddaughter away.

A scratch on the bedroom door got me to look up from my book, putting it down on my nightstand to let the cat inside.

"Are you hiding from the hag as well?" I asked the cat when it quickly ran inside the room to jump up on the bed.

I gave her a pat between the ears and she purred in satisfaction but gave me a dark look when I stopped to slip out of my robe and into my nightgown.

Before I joined the animal on the bed I blew out the candle lightened in the window and picked up my wand that had fallen from the nightstand.

When I put it back it occurred to me that something seemed to be missing on the narrow table, but I couldn't put my finger on what it was, and I was way too tired to figure it out. So I jumped in under the bedsheets, my head falling down on the pillow with a sigh of relief.

Finally, I'm alone.

But it didn't take long before the realisation hit me and the heartache was soon all over me.

Sirius, I miss you.

I nestled into a small ball underneath the blanket. The darkness seemed a lot darker than before. Why didn't I just speak to him? Why was I such a bloody coward?

My mind wandered, my chest growing heavy before I finally fell into a worried sleep.

← ⧫ →

I dreamt about his lips. His crimson, soft lips that caressed my naked skin as I watched him undress. First, his robe, second his trousers and then his shirt, as his hands began touching my body-

But his hands weren't touching me. He was touching someone else, his fingers stroking the brunettes naked thighs as she leaned backwards, her eyes burning with lust as she smiled wickedly my way. Mary.

I tried to run away but wherever I went her eyes followed, and Sirius voice that silently moaned her name. Mocking me. Mary, Mary, Mary.

I ran faster, the sound of Sirius' voice slowly fading away as I stepped into another scene. It was dark, and I grabbed my wand, pointing it up before me as a shimmering light caught my attention. In the middle of the dark area laid a letter, an empty page that lightened up the room.

I walked towards it, my empty hand reaching for the paper but the second before I could reach it, it caught flames. The fire turning the letter into nothing else but ashes, and the room once again was filled with darkness when an evil laugh echoed around me.

I hugged the wand harder, "Who's there?" I demanded to know, my voice shaking. But there wasn't an answer. The laugh faded, and my feet slowly turned when another thing caught my attention. In the centre of my eye, a white door appeared, its golden handle shining as bright as sunlight on a summer morning.

My heart rushed at the next sound to appear. A loud, harsh knock on the other side of the door, waiting for me to open, welcoming whoever stood behind it.

My hand felt cold when I reached for the shining handle, my breath twitching when I pushed it down to reveal what or who waited for me.

The door swung open and my breath got caught in my throat as I stood eye to eye with the evil smirking man, his long light hair hanging down his shoulders. His eyes, frozen blue, the same as mine stared deep into my frightened soul.

I knew who he was. The many stories and photos I had seen of him as a child did him justice.

He smirked, still staring into my eyes when he lifted his arm, his black sleeve pulled up as he proudly showed me the mark engraved on his skin; a black skull, with a serpent escaping from its open jaws. The dark mark.

"Hello niece," he spoke with a wide smirk, his eyes burning with evil madness.

~
Facaclaim for Icarus Fione is Paul Boche, and if you don't know who he is: look him up. He's a beautyyyyy