The Art of Holding Hands

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I locked the door as I left and mentally locked up everything I was trying not to think about. I was going to enjoy myself and make a life here that I and my children will enjoy. As I turned around, I noticed Ed standing at the foot of the steps smiling up at me. I returned his smile as I made my way down, a blush slowly creeping up on to my face.
" You look lovely, Tara." He told me before kissing my cheek. It only caused my blush to increase but I hoped he wouldn't notice.
"Thank you. You look very handsome yourself." I teased him as he opened my door. He chuckled slightly while the door closed.

After 15 minutes of driving, we still hadn't reached our destination. Ed and I both talked about how our past few days had been before a comfortable silence filled the car. A silence that was interuppted by the news on the radio.

" Thank you for that. Now before we go on to the weather report, we would like to update you all on the biggest story right now. Bethany Collins, girlfriend of One Direction star Harry Styles, was reported missing yesterday. Those who have been following the case will now that Bethany called it quits a few weeks ago after 3 years for unknown reasons. Rumours had started to swirl about a week ago of the reconciliation when the pair were spotted going into and leaving a hospital. Nobody has come forward to confirm nor deny these rumours. Miss.Collins was reported missing from the home she shared with Styles yesterday evening under suspicious circumstances. While we are waiting for official reports or releases, sources have confirmed that Miss.Collins was suffering from health problems shortly before her disapperance. Police are appealing to anyone with any information about her whereabouts to come forward. Thank you."

Ed noticed how I was staring at the radio intensely and that I was no longer pink-cheeked.
"Horrible that, isn't it? I'd hate for anything like that to happen to my family, God only knows how her family is."
I cleared my throat and exhaled the breath I was holding before answering, " Yeah, it's terrible."

I think Ed realised that I didn't like the topic and he dropped it. I decided to change the subject as so to dwell on other things.
" So where are we going?" I put as smile on my face as I turned my full attention to him. A beautiful grin graced his features before he replied, " It's nowhere too fancy don't fret. I found it when I came here and I've always loved it. I thought it fitting to bring you to it." He stole a few glances at me while he spoke but kept his eyes on the road. Edinburgh was nowhere near as busy as London and I much preferred it.

We shortly parked the car and I followed Ed to our destination.
We arrived at the doors of a little blue restaurant called Aizle. It looked busy but thankfully Ed knew the manager and had a table reserved last minute. I eyed some of the dishes on the table which caused my stomach to rumble. I underestimated how loud it was because it caused Ed to turn around.
"Hungry, are we?" He teased, his eyes sparkling with amusement.
I could feel my face burn with embarrassment as we sat down.
"Hey, I'm not just eating for one here!" I shot back, grinning.
As I scanned through the menu, my mouth began to water and I realised it had been ages since I'd eaten.
"Hi guys, are you ready to order?" A young waitress approached us.
"Yes, please. Um, can I get the soup first and then the steak sandwich, well done, with salad on the side?" Ed ordered.
"No problem. And for yourself?" She turned to me.
"Can I have the same please but with chips and onion rings?"
God, I was bloody starving!
The waitress walked back to the kitchen with our orders and Ed and I kept talking.

                       ~~~~~~~~~
Nearly 2 hours had passed before we left the restaurant and I had really enjoyed my evening with Ed. I had managed to keep my mind occupied and focused on now instead of the past. I had come to terms in the few days that this is just how things are now and how they're going to stay and that I'm better off trying to move on.

Ed and I were walking down a street, chatting as we had been all evening when he stopped. His eyes focused on the street across the road and a grin split his face before he hastily grabbed my hand and we dashed across the road. He didn't seem to notice that his fingers were now interlaced with mine, having changed from merely holding them to guide me a moment ago. He was also fortunately unaware of my blushing cheeks and butterflies in my stomach caused by the sensation of his hand in mine. He was completely set on his target ahead and before I knew what was happening. I was standing in front of a bar with the notice "KARAOKE NIGHT!" stuck in the window.
He turned to me with that same grin on his face and eyebrows raised.
"Nope. No, no, no, no, no. Not a chance." I stated while turning to walk away.
"Aw, come on, please? Pretty please?" He tried pleading with me and pouting.
" No. I can't sing and it's way too embarassing." I shook my head and still tried to walk away but I was stopped by his hands gripping my arm.
" Come on. Just one song? I can't sing either but it'll be a blast."
I stared into his eyes and I could feel my resolve starting to crumble.
I bit my lip and groaned out a lengthy "Fine." And trudged after him into the bar.
He walked up to the bar and ordered himself a beer and me a plain 7-Up since I can't drink. I sat at a high table against the wall and waited for him to come back. A group of guys who were clearly drunk, were finishing up a slurred but entertaining rendition of "I Want It That Way" by The Backstreet Boys.
I clapped along with the crowd as they stumbled off and the next people were called. Ed put our drinks on the table and sat on the stool opposite me.
" So, I've put us down for "Livin' on a Prayer". He laughed as he took in my expression.
" Okay. It could be a lot worse. But I'm about to whoop your ass, be prepared!" I warned him.
"Oh really? How about this, whoever does better buys the next round?" He challenged.
"Easy. You're on" I smirked at him as we shook on it.

After two more songs it was our turn.
The music started playing and Ed jumper right into character and started doing a dance. It cracked me up but if he thought I was gonna let him, he had another thing coming. Right when he was about to start, I stole his thunder and started with the opening verse. I could see the shock on his face but I continued and put on the best performance I could.

We sang the last line together and the crowd clapped and cheered for us. I pushed back my hair and mouthed 'I won' to Ed. He shrugged his shoulders and nodded in agreement and we made our way off the stage.
"Give it up for Ed and Tara everybody! Cutest couple we've had tonight!" The DJ called through his microphone.
I glanced at Ed hoping he wouldn't notice the blush on my cheeks after being called a couple but he was just staring at his feet. Glad to know it wasn't awkward for just me.
He looked up and nodded towards the doors. I nodded in respone and grabbed my stuff before following him out.
"Hey, you didn't let me but the drinks!" I said as soon as we stepped outside.
"Another time. We should get going, it's late." He smiled at me, but it didn't seem to reach his eyes.
I pulled out my phone and I was suprised when Isaw that it was already 11.30.
"Yeah, you're right. Let's go."
We walked down the street in silence but it didn't feel right. It felt like something has changed. Ed broke it first.
" So that was a bit awkward when he called us a couple." He scratched the back of his neck and avoided meeting my eyes.
"Umm, yeah. It was." I replied also avoiding eye contact.

I was suprised when Ed stopped and a sigh fell from his lips as I turned to face him.
"Look, Tara, I really don't want to make things weird between us and I know we've only known each other for the shortest time. I also know that you're pregnant with another guys kids and you're going through a hard time right now, but I really like you. I think you're really special and I want us to be more than friends. I totally understand if you don't feel the same but I had to tell you." He blurted out.
I stood there in silence as I processed his words. Realisation of what he just said seemed to hit him and he cursed under his breath.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. God, I'm such an idiot!" His words rushed out while his hand ran over his face. I finally snapped out of whatever shock I was it and pulled his hand down from his face.
"It's okay. I really like you too and I think we could be something more but I want to take it slow. Like you said, I'm having someone else babies and I don't want you to feel like you have to stick around when you don't and I don't want to take advantage of the kindness you've shown me. I do want to try but I want to take it slow and make sure we're not rushing into things, okay?" I ignored the rattling of the drawer in the back of my head where I had locked my old life. I needed to move on and forget it all. This was what I wanted even if it was too soon, I didn't want to wait and let this chance at being happy pass me by.

Hope sparked in Ed's eyes as he listened to me and he smiled, this one reaching his eyes.
"I get it. Slow. I can do that."
A smile of my own stretched across my face. It felt like everything was starting to work out and my life was back on track.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
Woah, hello there!
Yes I know it's been a while and I starting on this chapter MONTHS ago but I got stuck about halfway through and didn't know where to go with it but at last, inspiration struck!
It's a long chapter, Maybe my longest one yet but it's long overdue.
Thank you so much to everyone who has voted and commented and added this story to their lists. My heart bursts everytime I get a notification.
This chapter is dedicated to MidnightMintIceCream who has shown so much love to this story that I almost cried!
Thank you all so so much and I promise I'll be back again soon!
-Beth xoxox

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