Ever Since the Beginning

Chapter One: Welcome to My Life

Chapter One

Ever since the fourth grade I've had a massive crush on the same boy. It's hopeless, I know. He'll never feel the same about me, but I'll never give up on him. I just can't.

Yep, that's me, Carrie. I'm the one who should be with Landon, not Hailey. I've known him longer, liked him longer, and has wanted him longer. Yes, I have dated other people but, I can only blame myself for being in this position. I should tell Landon how I feel. I really should. I just can't, we have been friends for so long and if I tell him it will just ruin everything. I guess I should tell you the background story behind this crush.

It all starts waaaaaay back in the fourth grade. I had glasses, didn't care what my hair looked like, and was the poster child for being weird and awkward. While, Landon was a chubby little kid who could always make me laugh. I always fall for the ones who can make me smile, but who doesn't? While being in the fourth grade was an amazing time what was even more amazing is the fact that my seat was right beside Landon's. I thought that I was the luckiest girl in the world. This is when our friendship really began. Fourth grade me couldn't really conceal the fact that she had a massive crush very well. So, the day Landon found out that I liked him had to be the most embarrassing thing to me. 

The surprising thing was that he didn't let that affect our friendship. We were like best friends throughout the fourth grade. The sad thing about fifth grade and on until eighth grade was that we didn't have classes together. It was sad but it never stopped me from dating other boys. I think that's where I messed up. I went and dated other boys and he dated other girls. By me doing that he must have thought that I didn't like him anymore. Just to think that for one second kills me.

Back to now. Now, Landon has a girlfriend. Her name is Hailey. Do they deserve to be together? NO! She is a cheating hoe. I know for a fact that she and another guy had some fun, a little too much fun if you ask me. It blows my mind that he is still with her. She cheats on him all of the time. He is so oblivious to it too. I wish I could open his eyes, but we're only friends and I really don't want to get in his business like that. It would just be so weird for both of us to have a conversation like that.

"Are you even listening to me?" Ashton asks.

Ashton is my best friend. She has been ever since middle school.

"Yes, it's not like I'm lost in my thoughts or anything." I answer her.

"Ha, sure looked like it! Now come on what's on your mind? You've been acting weird lately and I'm worried. You aren't thinking about cancelling our plans?"

Did I mention that she knows everything about me? Well, she does. The only thing she doesn't know is my massive crush on Landon. I really should tell her...

"Why would I want to do that, you know I wouldn't want to miss our annual winter break sleepover." I answer her.

"Well good! And if you decide to tell me what's on your mind I'll understand, no matter how good or bad it is." Ashton says to me while smiling.

I think I might tell her. I just have to get the conversation on the right path tomorrow night. It is my birthday after all. We'll be having fun and it would be the perfect time.

~The Next Day~

 I am beyond ready to get out of this place called school. Today is the last day before the beloved winter break. Also, tomorrow is my birthday! YAY!

In school today I can already tell you about how much work we are going to do...absolutely nothing! In my math class, the only class I have with Landon, we had fun. My math class is like one big family. We all basically hang out and have a good time in that class. For the most part everyone says me and Landon should just go ahead and date. We both have our excuses though, his is Hailey and mine is that I like someone else. Gah, I am about tired of holding this in, but I do kind of like someone. He is nothing compared to Landon though. Nobody compares to him, nobody does. 

Even though we are in high school our teacher thought it would be fun to make mini boxes out of Christmas cards. I have to admit, the little kid in me was thrilled to make them! I ended up making four of them.

We were all hanging out in class when the bell had rung, that means only one more class and then we will be outta here for a month. Everyone had basically left the classroom and it was just me and Landon. I was getting up from sitting on the floor, and then the unthinkable happened. Landon was standing in front of me and wouldn't let me leave, he had his arms spread wide. I knew what he wanted and I was freaking out on the inside. I knew he wouldn't let me leave without giving him a hug, so I caved.

I hugged him. His arms were tight around me and I swear we were there for an eternity before he let me go. During this I was hoping and praying that he wouldn't feel how fast my heart was beating. I don't think he did, but if he did he didn't say anything or let it affect him.

This was exactly what I wanted, I wanted us to be a thing. I wanted him to want me as much as I wanted him. After our magical moment was over I had to get to my second block class. As much as I tried, I couldn't contain what I was feeling inside. I swear my grin was as big as it could possibly be. I can't wait for tonight! I am going to tell Ashton everything!

The rest of the day went fine. As I drove home I planned exactly how I was going to tell Ashton. It was going to be great. Our sleepover is going to be the bomb, like always.

A/N: Well, I know that was short but whatcha think? This is my first time writing something like this and actually posting it on here. If you have any suggestions or anything to do with this story or my writing please feel free to tell me! I would like to improve my writing and all. But any who thanks for reading!