Above All Else

Chapter Twenty-Five

He looks down at his lap and I have his answer without speaking. I grow angry. "Speak truthfully, sir. I removed Samuel from Nicole's care because I want the best for him. Think truly hard because if I hear that he's been mistreated in anyway, there will be consequences."

"I don't... think it would be best for me to raise him, Your Majesty. I am constantly on the water, in trading. There would be no one to care for him. I- just-"

"Don't think you'd be the best for him," I utter, finishing his sentence. I think about offering him money, so he would have the time but choose against it. A real parent would find a way to survive as long as they loved their child. This entire conversation, he's made it known that he regards his son as little as Nicole did. I reach into my top drawer, pulling out a contract.

"Nicole has already signed. I require you to as well. This relinquishes your claim on Samuel. He will not be given your last name, but will take his adoptive families name when the time comes."

"... Will I ever get to see him?"

I purse my lips, disapprovingly. "This relinquishes all claim on him, sir," I repeat, firmly, setting the pen down in front of him. His very clear eyes meet mine, holding there for a moment. I see the wheels turning in his mind.

"It's very hard... in my profession to support a child but I could... if I were granted help? Possibly?"

I tilt my head, as if I don't know what he's going on about. "Help? What kind?"

"Um, well, funds? I mean, he is the son of a former queen. I will need to hire security, a better home- for him."

"Are you trying to bargain for your son, sir?" I ask, with intention to embarrass him. His eyes widen.

"N-No, of course not. I was only suggesting-"

"That your decision relies on what the crown is willing to give to take your son. Let me be clear- your affair with my sister-in-law has just nearly destroyed the reputation of this monarchy. The only reason you are in my presence right now is because I don't want this child to dream his parents fought to keep him. You will sign that form, proving to myself and to him that you both are not worthy of his love and then you are dismissed."

I stare at him as he shuffles uncomfortably in his seat like the coward he is before signing his name quickly on the contract. My eyes follow his body as he stands, bowing his head before turning for the door. I study his fast walk silently until he's out of my sight.

My eyes descend to the contract before me, where both parents of Samuel have willingly given him up. I think of what that will do to him later in life, when he's finally able to understand the depth of the situation he was brought into. I shake my head in disgust, knowing it's more important than ever that I place him with people who will give him the love he needs double-fold.

...

I hesitate when closing the door to the infirmary. It's rather cold in here for sterilization purposes. I cross my arms, rubbing my palms over the prickled skin. My heels click against the white tile. I stop in front of the small, dull-colored crib to hold the baby. Samuel is inside, sleeping deeply, wrapped in a blanket.

He's been placed here to keep him out of the eyes of the servants, so word won't get out that he's here. I can't help but feel sad, gazing at his puffy eyes and pink skin. I never got to see Alexander when he was first born. I imagine he looked like this.

The nurse walks into the room and I turn to look at her. Jackie bows, looking surprised I'm here.

"Forgive me, ma'am. I've just come to feed him."

She's holding a warm bottle, with a small towel around it. I smile, shaking my head.

"Of course. I just came to see him."

"He's very healthy. He cries a good deal but I suspect because- he doesn't have constant people around him."

"He hasn't received proper love yet," I whisper, sadly. Jackie nods.

"Well, this bottle will cheer him up," she says, coming around the crib. I gape, hesitantly, knowing I shouldn't hold him but I want to.

"I can do that," I say, warmly. She nods, handing me the bottle.

"Of course. I'll be in the office if you need me, Your Majesty."

I nod, watching as she leaves. I set down the bottle in the crib and reach down, lifting him up. He's so light. I chuckle softly to myself, cradling him. His eyes open slowly, a deep blue color.

I rub his chest gently, grinning as he yawns. "Hello," I whisper. "I'm Mia."

He blinks as if he's trying to figure out where he is, why it's so bright. I grab the bottle, smiling.

"Are you hungry, Sam? You need to eat so you can get big and strong." I place it by his lips and they part, suctioning around the bottle. I hear him begin to drink, glad for it. I move around the room slowly, humming to myself.

I always sing to Alexander to put him to sleep. Doris Day always seems to do the job. The lyrics of Gone With The Wind seem to fall from my lips with ease, from habit. I've thought all day about Henry's proposal about The Fountain, knowing I should have just said yes. He's probably gone through so much to get Parliament to say yes to it. And I do miss singing. But I know I'm needed here as well. I know that's the most important thing. I can't even imagine what it would feel like to hear that familiar sound of applause, that familiar rush after a performance I used to know so well. I'm sure I'd love to experience it again.

Samuel's eyes stare at my face, curiously. I smile, rocking him slowly, finishing the song. His eyes are closed, his eyelashes flickering barely by the end and I feel triumph. He didn't cry once.

"Looks like you've got another fan."

I turn with a smile, finding Henry by the door. "How long have you been there?"

"A while," he answers, walking to me. I smile as he presses his lips to my head, clasping my neck. I hear him sigh.

I glance at the crib. "Henry, he can't stay in here. Not in this crib. It's freezing in here."

"He has to remain here. We cannot risk him being seen... but I will make sure the room is furnished well."

I breathe in, hating it but knowing neither of us have a choice. "What happened with the dad?"

"He signed away rights to the crown," he whispers, above my head. I pull back, looking up at him.

"Are you serious?"

He nods, sighing again. "Turns out Nicole promised him wealth and now that he's not getting any, he doesn't want anything to do with her."

"But the baby-"

"He tried to bargain, Mia. He wanted money in return for taking Samuel."

I feel fury in my heart. "What kind of people-"

"I know," he whispers, caressing my face. "We will find him a good home, Mia. I've been thinking about asking Royce about it."

That is a surprise to me but I know they are good people. "Do you think-?"

"I'm not sure. And I don't want to force him on anyone. I- would like to find people who really want him, but also can support him."

I look down as I place him gently into the crib. "I- wish we could keep him."

I feel Henry's hand on my back. "I won't deny... I've thought of it too."

My fingers grip the sides of the crib. "We'd be the best people for him."

"It is impossible, baby," Henry says after a moment. I nod, knowing he's right.

I turn into Henry, breathing in deeply. He wraps an arm around my shoulders, kissing my hair.

"Everything will work out," he murmurs. "I promise."