Eyes Up, Guardian

Chapter 10

Tessa didn't seem to mind. She simply sat down on the floor in front of him and began cleaning his feet. Picking out the glass and wiping away the blood. When she was done, she set the cloth in the sink and washed her hands of his blood, drying her hands with a towel before moving back over to stand in front of him.

She reached out, cupping his face with her hand, her fingers bushing his cheek softly, like butterfly wings. She brushed a tear away with her thumb, looking into his eyes, concerned. He felt his chest tighten, the lump in his throat grew. He couldn't bear to see her looking at him like that. His mouth tasted like vomit, his head ached from crying and his eyes began to sting again as her thumb brushed away that tear. His wings slid around him, but they slouched, draping down on either side of him as he didn't have the strength to lift them. A small cut on his left wing slowly clotted, gone unchecked because he was scared. Because he was weak. Because he couldn't trust anyone, even Tessa, to touch his wings, to see his past. It was cowardly, he was cowardly.

"What happened?" Tessa's voice brushed aside his thoughts, softly, gently. Brushing aside that curtain of daggers while remaining unharmed. He shook his head, he didn't want to speak, he didn't want to cry. Why did she have to see him like this? Thank the Traveler she'd come, but why did she have to see him like this?

"I-" He shuddered, taking a sharp breath, trying not to cry again, "I don't know." He said, "I had a nightmare and it triggered a panic attack. I couldn't breathe- fuck- I don't-" his voice choked off. He only cursed without meaning to when he was in pain or crying. Tears he'd been unable to keep back spilled out over his cheeks. "I can't- I'm sorry." He shook his head, putting his head in his hands, his wings coming up around him.

Tessa slid her arms around him, being careful not to touch his wings. Not because she was afraid- no, he could tell she wasn't afraid- because she genuinely understood and could see his sensitivity. His throat tightened and he grit his teeth, reminding himself to breathe. He didn't want to drop into another panic attack, he couldn't handle that at this point. His chest felt so tight he wasn't sure he could breathe, but he did his best. Distantly, he felt his hand moving, as though it was moving on its own accord, grabbing her arm and then her hand, holding it like it was a lifeline. His lifeline. And to his surprise, she didn't pull away. She took his hand in both of hers and held on, reminding him of what was here and real. He felt the cold, darkness seep out of him, replaced by the warmth of her hand, and slowly, his tears dried.

A while later, Damian sat on Tessa's couch, a mug of what he assumed was hot chocolate warming his hands. Tessa had plunked it into his hands just moments after she'd brought him into the apartment. It was as though she had emergency hot chocolate ready for whenever someone needed it.

She'd brought him out of his room, through the hallways, complete with Guardians up at ungodly hours of the night. All the way up to the upper levels of the housing quarters in the tower. Her apartment in the communal area, rather than being in the Hunter section. His was as well, it was hard to share living spaces with only Warlocks, even if it was only common rooms.

On Tessa's level were a bunch of Guardians, mostly between levels ten and thirty, it was about as good as you could get until you topped level thirty- which Tessa had. As they reached Tessa's door, a Warlock girl shot her a questioning look, but seeing Damian, the look in her eyes changed, looking to be offering her help. But Tessa shook her head. "Later," she seemed to say, with only a look. The Warlock understood, but watched as she slipped into her apartment, pulling Damian after her.

He'd done the same thing he usually did the hide his wings, if Light were magic, he'd call it a spell, but it wasn't. The Light was a a force, and he found that if you wanted something, if you needed something badly enough, it would do its best to give it to you. But Damian was weak, and his Light was as well. Anyone looking hard enough could have found his wings, and Tessa, though she couldn't see them with her eyes, could probably feel then with her Light, even with her lack of experience.