To Be A Nerd

How It Started

My parents have never really been all that proud of me. I never really had good grades, and as much as my dad tried, I could never get interested in any of the family fandoms!

One thing that has always intrigued me, however, was sports. Hockey, football, basketball, you name it! And when I was in grade nine, I tried out for the football team. I felt good about my choice, my parents, however, took some time to support me.

Mom was the first to be happy for me, stating that if I enjoy myself, and keep a level head, she'll encourage me all the way! Dad, on the other hand, wouldn't stop questioning me:

"Why can't you just play chess?"

"There are so many dangers in sports! Why can't you just focus on school?"

"You know you won't get far with sports."

"I thought we agreed on the drama group!"

"Why can't you be more like Dean?"

That last one would always hurt the most. But eventually, he relented and started encouraging me, while still occasionally comparing me to my brother. Dean and I never got along, but he would sometimes mention that maybe I should try sports. I always protested that if I were to go into sports I wouldn't have any friends. I'd be the least popular person in school.

"Is popularity all that matters to you, Ron?"

"No," I replied standing up, "but it would be kinda annoying being in sports considering you're literally friends with everyone! Not to mention you're Mom and Dad's favourite!"

"Okay, fair enough," he shrugged, "but that doesn't mean you shouldn't follow your passion."

"Hold up, who said I have a passion? I've never picked up a basketball!"

"True, but it's obvious you like sports, you really should try."

Eventually, he convinced me, and once I told him about my plan we started getting closer. He helped me study, as that was part of the agreement I made with Mom and Dad, and even gave me some tips from various books he'd read.

After tryouts I started noticing that people stopped talking to me, a few friends stayed, mainly because I had agreed to watch any scary episodes of their favourite shows; I'm still afraid of shadows to this day, but anyway I noticed that I had slowly gone down in popularity. In a month I only three friends left, Rose, Irene, and Logan.

And of course, while I've been slowly descending into bulliable levels of unpopularity, Dean's been climbing the social ladder, joining clubs, winning nerd tournaments, and even getting the lead role in the school play. I'm proud of him, my parents are too, obviously, sometimes I help him with lines or to practice for stuff, though I don't see the point, he always does everything perfectly. But even though he's literally got a lineup of people just waiting to talk to him, he still comes and talks to me and my teammates to the surprise, and disappointment, of everyone.

"Why's he always hanging out with those muscle heads? Like he's always with that Ron dude," one guy complained, glaring at me.

"Gosh, for someone named Sherlock you really are dense," one of my ex-friends, Gwenne, remarked.

"What's that supposed to mean???" He yelled indignantly.

"They're brothers, Babe." So, they're dating?

"Oh," his cheeks reddened with embarrassment, "how do you know that?"

"I used to be Ron's friend. Seriously, do you even try to notice your surroundings?"

"I have a lot of stuff to work on! How am I supposed to know who's friends with who or who's related?"

"Yet you have time to complain about Dean spending time with the jocks." She stated plainly.

"Well, I, uh..."

"Anyway, see you at the marathon!" she called out to him, leaving him to sort out his embarrassment. Approaching me. Why was she coming up to me? What did I do? What's she gonna say? I don't have time for-

"Hey, Ron. Long time no see," she smiled. Seriously?

"Yeah," I replied shortly, starting to turn away from her.

"Sorry if you heard that whole... thing," gesturing vaguely to where she and Sherlock were chatting.

"It's fine, I've gotten used to it. At least no one's tried to pick a fight with me." I faced her with a sheepish smile.

She laughed. Is this happening right now? Gwenne, one of the nicest girls I've met, is using that sweet, angelic laugh of hers... against me? My fists clenched, trying to calm down.

"What's so funny?" I growled, stepping back a step.

"You seriously think that people will try to pick a fight? Come on! We're not idiots," she giggled. My anger melted away, replaced with a sense of loneliness. I miss our chats, Gwenne.

"No," I sighed, "you're not, I am."

"Why?" Concern etched on her face. Does she feel sorry for me?

"I practically signed up for an entire school year of people hating my guts and almost no friends." I held back tears, seriously dude? Are you getting emotional over this? No one really cared about you, you know that you were always the odd one out

"But you're doing something you love. I remember you trying to get us to watch as many sports events as you could. So, does it really matter?"

"Yes!" I almost shrieked, thankful the hallway was empty.

"And why is that?" Pulling me in for a hug.

"No reason." I lied. I didn't want to turn into Rose watchingNina Tucker's death.

"How about we meet up after school, Ronny? I'll get the others to come if you want." I almost cried at the sound of her old nickname for me. She smiled at me. Seeing through my lie, of course, she saw through it, idiot, she's a tiny genius.

"Sure," I said flatly, "But can the others not come?" I pleaded, not sure how this encounter would turn out.

"How about at that new café nearby? I'll drive you if you want." Her smile widened.

"You mean The Book Nook?"

"Yeah."

"Are you sure you want me to go there?" I grimaced.

"Why do you ask?" confusion riddled her expression.

"Well, generally speaking, I'm not exactly the type of person others would want to see there, y'know, considering I'm a jock." I stuttered.

"Who cares what others think? Besides, I'll be there." She smiled once more, reassuringly this time.

"That's another thing, your boyfriend might be there, and," I lowered my voice, "people are already staring at us."

"Wait, you think Sherlock over there's my boyfriend?" she laughed, "Ron, come on! Think logically; do you really think I'd go out with him? As for our classmates, like I said, who cares what they think."

I do! I wanted to shriek, I care what they think because I don't know how I'm going to act! I care because I'm scared of all these judgmental people thinking I'm no good. I care because-

"If you want we could just take our orders to go," Gwenne broke my thoughts, "I understand if you don't want to be around other people, especially if they give you a hard time."

"Ok," I released a breath I didn't realise I was holding, "that works."

As I watched her leave I suddenly realised that I had started crying during our conversation. Crap.