Yeah We're Freaks, But That's Alright [Jamilton] Modern College AU

Confusion

A/N: Hello people reading this. Just a heads up, if you were looking for a nice and happy Jamilton fic then you might wanna read something else. And this is my first story so if it sucks then sorry. Enjoy ^.^

Alexander's POV

It all started when my mother died. I still feel her lifeless body holding me. After that all I really felt was emptiness. Yeah sometimes I'd feel good when I'm with my friends but, I was always empty. It would get worse and worse as the day went on, and I always felt better when it was time to sleep.

Sleeping is when I can lose touch of reality, Shaping how I want the world to be. I can give everyone I love a perfect life, and give the people who hurt others a living hell. But that isn't the real world. The real world is where girls are expected to look bulimic, where it's wrong to be in LGBT+, where racism, sexism, and transphobia live on. But of course most everyone knows that, so it's best not to remind everyone.

I snap to reality when the bell rings. It's the start of class. Mr. Washington starts of with a lecture about something, but I can't really hear. I'm transfixed by my enemy, Thomas Jefferson. He's sleeping in class to the left of me like always. If I'm being honest, he's hot as hell, but an absolute dick face. He constantly undermines me since he's the tallest person in the class, and me the shortest. But I can't help but blush when he does that sexy half smile.

I feel something hit the back of my head, I turn around​ to see Laurens, my dorm mate, smiling at me. I pick up the paper ball he threw and opened it up.

"Pay attention ya idiot. Or you can keep your goo goo eyes on Jefferson."
I read. A little turtle is drawn at the bottom.

I can't help but turn red. I sighed and folded the piece of paper, putting it in my pocket. I paid attention the rest of class and got started on a draft of an essay that was due in about 1 month. The bell rings and I gather my stuff.
Laurens comes up to me and grins stupidly.

"I still don't understand how you can hate your crush." He blurts out.

"I'm not crushing on him. If he was actually a decent person then maybe I would be." I say calmly.

"Yeah yeah, when you guys are dating and screwing each other every night I'll remind you about this conversation." Laurens says this all the time. And as always, I roll my eyes. We meet up with our good friends Herc and Lafyette. The four of us walk around the campus before returning to our dorms.

It's 6:00 PM. Laurens makes some popcorn and starts a movie.

"Popcorn for dinner, how nourishing." I comment, while making a turkey sandwich.

"I had a salad for lunch, so... Ha." Laurens pouts in a joking manner. I stifle a laugh and sit next to him. He was watching "Deadpool" Laurens is laughing his ass off, but I hadn't stayed for long. I have school stuff to do online.

At 10:00 I landed myself onto Instagram. I noticed that Jefferson was in my recommended. I was sorta curious, so I clicked. His profile was divided into 3 categories. Selfies, photography, and him playing violin. He seemed like the kind of guy to just shallowly post pictures of himself, but he's apparently different than that.

I found myself scrolling down more and more. His face appearing and disappearing on the screen. My smile got bigger and wider. It was the first time I was happy at night. I stopped at a picture of him shirtless.

"Goin to the gym again. :P" was the caption. I couldn't stop staring at my desktop. My face starts to flush. But I don't understand why. Why am I in love with this man?"