Soldier

Chapter 1

"Dear Curtis,

I miss you so much. I know you left two days ago but I already want you to come back. I've travelled with Shannon all day and I've been really exhausted. I tried a new record label today and fortunately they want me to come back with more music. I know I've asked you this a multiple times but do you really think there's a record label out there to accept me? I know I'm being ridiculous and skeptical but I've been searching and hoping for the past years. Do you really think I have the capability to become a singer in the future?

Anyway, I don't want to keep on stressing out with this issue. How are you Curtis? I've heard from Isaac that your arrival there was late. Is it true? I'm sorry if I ask you too many questions. I'm just anxious on how you've been since you left Santa Barbara. 

Don't worry too much about me, baby. I'm doing alright. Take care of yourself and if you can please write back soon and tell me how you've been. I love you so much. Be safe. 

Katy"

I folded the letter into half and inserted it inside the envelope. It was already 5:30 in the afternoon and I'm hoping that the post office is still open so I can mail this letter. I put on my topsiders and snatched the car keys from the kitchen table. I open the front door carefully, making sure I don't bang it too loud. I see my father sitting on the steps of our front porch tightly clutching the bible. He read quietly while squinting a bit due to the small words. I walk towards him and walk down the steps. He looks up at me. 

"Where you headed?" He asks, still squinting.

"To the post office. I'm going to mail this." I show him the envelope which I clasp tightly in my hand. He goes back to reading and I head for the car parked in front of our house. 

I went inside and sat on the driver's seat. In no less than a minute, I take off and head to the post office as fast as I can. I arrive seeing Brenda in the reception. I smile at her politely before handing the envelope. 

"No need to tell me." She responds while smiling. I keep my mouth shut and pay attention to her. 

"For Curtis!" She shouts to her co worker and hands the envelope. I watch them do the process of sending mails and putting it in a machinery. The work was spontaneous and repetitive so I decided to head back home.

I nestle on the couch with different things lingering in my mind. All I could think about was Curtis. It was crazy how I was so madly in love with him. I hope he is invulnerable and doesn't worry too much about me as much as I do with him. I feel someone draw near. I look up to see who it was. Angela. 

She walks forward then sits at the edge of the couch placing her hand on my foot. She studies my face a bit then opens her mouth to speak. 

"You okay?" She creased her eyebrows. 

"Mhm, yeah. I was just thinking about Curtis. Don't worry Ang, I'm fine." I reply to her, unshakened. I pull myself up and walk past Angela without speaking out a word to her what I was about to do.

After all, I was really exhausted. I wanted to be idle and decided not to write new songs for the recent record label that Shannon and I went to. I wanted to clear my head and not worry myself too much. I was being too melancholic and negative about things that might not happen. 

After I finished showering, I lay down in my bed feeling relaxed. The sheets were newly washed and it felt soothing on my skin. I wanted to go back to the halcyon days where everything was joyous and peaceful. I look to my side seeing pictures of me and my siblings. I look at it for a while then face away from it. My bed felt very spacious and empty. I wanted to sleep but it required a lot of effort. I felt alone and empty. 

Empty without Curtis. I was longing for him. I just wish it was already morning so that I could keep myself busy and not fill my mind of him too much. I shut my eyes closed. I kept reminding myself to think of halcyon days.