A Love Already Blossomed

Chapter 7

I walked out of my room, my thoughts still racing in my mind. What was it about me that she didn't like? Was it my way of dealing with things, my attitude, my depression, my... face?

My anger got the best of me, so I flipped the spare chair that was beside my bench. I let out a large amount of air and ran my fingers through the secure hair of my wig. Would she be gone forever? I couldn't live one day without her. My heart wouldn't endure such pain. It couldn't!

I walked back to my room, sitting down beside the music box. I stared at it, and wondered why every day couldn't be a masquerade. If everyone wore masks and then got to know each other, then there would be no problem once the mask was removed. It would not be the same way for me, however. Even if people got to know me and appreciate me for who I am, they would take off my mask and see the marks of the horrible person I was before. On my face, they would see scars of the person I was, and deep down inside, still am. No one wild ever accept me and that was the truth.

The sound of footsteps clicking on the floor stopped my thinking. All of my thoughts were cleared, and I got up from my previous position of sitting in front of the music box. A small smile appeared on my face, but it was later replaced by anger. I could almost feel the smoke coming out of my ears as the owner of the footsteps, Y/N stepped out of the shadows. She walked to the organ and put back the chair I had flipped. I quickly walked across the length of my bedroom and walked to where Y/N was just starting to stand. I approached her and grabbed her shoulders, forcing her to look at me.

"Where have you been?" I hissed through clenched teeth. 'You had me scared half to death. I thought you would never come back,' I wanted to say.

"I've just been out getting food and water," Y/N replied in a calm voice. "I left you a note," she said.

What? How could I have not seen it?

"Where was it?" I asked, trying to make myself seem as angry as I could because maybe she just might see how much I cared for her. But of course, my mind works differently than many people's, so she would most likely just get frightened. I shook Y/N by the shoulders.

"It was underneath your mask, Master," she replied smoothly.

A silence filled the room and my hands loosened. I couldn't stay angry at her forever. I would just make her upset if I did. I couldn't bear the thought of her being sad.

"Once again, Y/N, I told you to call me by my name, which, if you have forgotten, is Erik," I said, trying to sound and be gentle. "How many times do I have to tell you?"

"Not many times, Erik," Y/N replied.

I nodded, internally smiling. "Good."

Y/N's eyes looked into mine, and I could see every color in them. They were so beautiful and so was she. She was surely the most beautiful woman ever to exist. Every aspect of her was perfect: the way her hair fell, the way her eyelashes curled, the way the colors of her eyes mixed, how her cheeks rolled down to her jaw, the way her nose was just perfect and created the image that screamed the name 'Y/N'. The way her jaw was angles was perfect. Even the way her beautiful lips curled.

Oh, those amazing lips, how they swelled and completed the image of Y/N. My eyes stayed on them, but only for a fraction of a second before my eyes moved back to hers. Suddenly, I felt a shock run through my hands as they made even more contact with her body. This made me aware of how brilliantly close we were. If I could just move a bit more, my lips would finally be on hers, and I would be content. I moved forward a little, allowing her to adjust, even though I only moved a little. I looked at her lips and imagined what it would be like to have hers against mine, to transfer all of my love I had for her into her mind, making her aware of my affections. I looked back to her eyes and moved closer to her until our breaths were mixing.

It was then that I came to my senses, realising that she might not feel the same about me. This might ruin a friendship, my only friendship. Y/N was the only thing that kept me stable, and I needed her with me to feel complete. Without her I was nothing but a ghost of my past, a shadow of who I was when I was with her. Without her, I wouldn't be able to live.

I removed my hands from her shoulders and walked away, still keeping my calm, phantom-like stature. In reality, however, I was anything but calm. My mind was racing and so was my heart, both pulsing at speeds that I thought were impossible. Perhaps they were until now.

My thoughts circled around Y/N. How could I do this to her? I can't just break a friendship because of my idiocy and have her living on the streets again. That was no way for a person of her excellence to live. She needed a proper home and a proper friend, which I can't say that she had, even in the lair with me. She still needed someone, and I had to stay by her and accompany her during the challenges in life. She needed someone to look after her, not put her in danger. By doing what I almost did, I almost put her out on the streets. She would want to leave me after what I did, wouldn't she? She was probably stressed out, pacing in her room, wondering about what had just happened.

My thoughts also roamed to the ones that I had been thinking of earlier. I couldn't accept my love for her if she didn't like me back. I didn't know how I would be able to live if she didn't feel the same. Did I love her? I knew nothing about love, so how could I be sure of this? I shook my head and once again denied my emotions and went back to my thoughts from a few seconds earlier.

How could I have been so foolish? I put her under stress, and under a huge amount of pressure. I only wanted the best for her, and there I was, scaring her. How could I have done that? It was repulsive and un-gentleman-like.

But it was so amazing at the same time. She was so beautiful, too, with her breaths flowing irregularly out of her lips and her eyes looking innocently up at mine. Her eyes were beautiful. In that moment, only a strip of color wrapped around large, black orbs. Her hair was covering her face, which I could see every detail about. I could see every mark, every blemish. She was ravishing even then, and mostly then. How good it felt to have our breaths mixing, our faces so close to each other.

My eyes went wide. 'No,' I thought to myself. I could not love a friend. It would ruin everything for me, as well as for her, and mostly for her. I couldn't continue going on loving her.

Or could I?

~
A/N: Sorry that this chapter was late. My grandma is making me visit so many places where I can't type or adjust anything. She is driving me insane.... Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and thank you so much for all of the reads!!!!! I hope you liked the changes I've made in this chapter (and most likely only in this chapter. I'll decide if I want to add an if more to it and if I want to go a bit more into the story and explain more). Thank you guys so much for reading!