The New Girl

Daddy Issues ✔

 I slapped the palm of my hand against my forehead and rolled my eyes, letting out a loud sigh. This can't be happening right now. It just can't be. I'm not ready to see him. 

There were seven cars aligned perfectly in my driveway and my father's security team surrounded my house. 

2 guards stood at each possible entrance of my home and there were four men that stood outside of the gate. I wondered if all this was necessarily but based on his sudden appearance I'm guessing it was. 

Something bad was coming, and I knew this encounter wouldn't end well. I could barely tolerate the man and I now that may sound harsh but it was true. He had put me and my brother though way too much for me to ever be happy with him.

After my brother was killed, nothing was the same for my family.

My parents looked at life differently. 

At each other differently.

And even me differently.

My Dad had taken my brother's death as a way for him to easily increase his business without having to worry about three extra people to look out for as well. He was left with only one child, which meant providing for his family had become just the slightest bit easier yet he still refused to pay attention to me.

He had focused more on making stupid movie deals than focusing on how my mom was feeling about the loss of her son, or even how I felt at the loss of my brother. He only cared about himself and he drowned himself in his own self-pity without even a second thought of anyone else's feelings.My dad was a famous director in hollywood. At one point I think he stopped remembering that he had a family.He did one hell of a job hiding his kids from the public and honestly, that was okay with me. Big screens and flashing lights never seemed to intrigue me.

Honestly I was never quite sure what my mom wanted. One day, she would praise how amazing the entertainment business was and the next,she would curse it. She screamed and yelled and pleaded with god to bring him back but we both knew that wasn't going to happen. Shaun was gone.I never understood how she could both hate and love something all in the same breath.

The attention attracted her but she didn't want what happened to Shaun to happen to me so she practically begged for my father to be done with that life.I think she figured that if he just dropped everything all of our problems would go away. I knew they wouldn't and I think,maybe deep down inside of her she knew they wouldn't either.

My father couldn't give up his life in the land of the rich, so she left him. Ironically, it made me feel like she actually did care about me.

It's sad that it took my brother dying for her to actually show it though, isn't it?

My parents were hurt but In my eyes, they had no right to be. My brother was my best friend. Yes, Julian was in my life and he was still one of my closest friends but my brother was above him. My brother was above everyone. It had always been us.

He was more than just my brother, more than my best friend, he was like a parent too. He looked out for me when my parents were too caught up in business to even take two seconds out of their day to worry about their own children's well being. I always felt bad for him because while he was so busy taking care of me, there wasn't really anyone who was taking care of him. We always had each other and I was there but there were just certain things that he needed that I could never help him with like he could help me.

One day,he had gotten so fed up with them. I was so young and innocent then, but then again when your exposed to as many thing as I was at that age, how innocent can you really be?