I Ran Over my Mate! BWWM (First Draft!!!)

[23]: Fresh Air and Control

It's been a week now since that eventful day which ended in me managing to actually give myself up to Ian. Deep down I feel like a complete slut for spreading my legs so easily for a man I hardly knew and has caused me to believe he's bipolar.

The longer I kept thinking about it, the dirtier I felt I'd become. It was sickening and I couldn't believe myself now. That night was definitely a mistake. And I think Ian felt that way too because he's been giving me weird glances whenever he's around, like he regrets it. Hell, I regret it probably more than he does.

"Pretty lady, are you alright?" I hear Dylan quiz from my lap.

I look down at him and nod my head before kissing the top of his mop of chocolate curls. "Yes, I'm fine munchkin."

He looked up at me with the cutest pout. "I'm not munchkin. I'm your man."

My eyes widened at that remark and I heard Amy's bark of laughter behind me. This little boy really was too grown for his age, yet it was still kinda cute.

"Okay, Dylan," I said scooping him up in my arms and blowing raspberries on his cheek. His responsive giggle cheered my broken heart up just by a fraction. "You're too cute."

"You two are the cutest thing ever," Amy remarked as she helped the other children with their fingerprinting as she continued, "even though I don't think he knows that he can't be with you."

Dylan was quick to launch out of my lap and place his messy fists on his hips. "And why can't I?"

"Because she already belongs to the Alpha," Amy answered with a strict tone, scolding him for disrespecting an adult.

When she said that, my throat constricted and eyes became irritated. Just the thought of Ian right now has become a sensitive topic for me because I didn't know how I would face him.

Ever since the morning after our rendezvous, he managed to increase the guards around the pack house and raise patrol numbers. I was told it was because he just didn't want the rogues to get any ideas, but I knew it was because he couldn't trust me anymore to stay inside. He believed that just because I'm a newly shifted wolf, which only he knows about, that I'm too weak and unpredictable.

I don't think he would ever be able to trust me again or look at me the same way now that I've submitted myself to him without any thoughts of my trust issues. He thinks I'm easy now and probably lied to him about everything. I've screwed up.

A familiar bile starts to rise to my throat and I race to the nearest bathroom, puking my guts out. It wasn't the most pleasant feeling, but I was starting to get used to it along with the once in a while pains in my stomach. The experience was draining me physically, causing me to crave more food and sleep all hours of the day when I'm not helping out Amy with the kids or Jillian with the injured/ sick pack members.

I've been experiencing these symptoms ever since the day after I spent hanging out with Julian. I believe it was due to the sandwich Anastasia made me; she probably put something rancid in it and gave me food poisoning. That's the only thing I've come up with so far.

"Destiney, are you okay?" Amy's soft voice calls from the doorway, concern evident.

I groan and flush the toilet before going to wash out my mouth in the sink for now. I'll brush it once I finish helping Amy.

It was silent for awhile after I cleaned my mouth out and washed my face to cool off. Amy was the one to break the silence.

"I'm worried for you Luna," she remarks bluntly. She walks in and puts a hand on my shoulder. "I appreciate your help with the children, but I've also noticed how often you've been losing your food. It's startling and unhealthy."