Mother
When I was little,
Mother used to call me:
Honey cakes, Apple tart
Pumpkin pie, Sugar Plum
Cookie Monster, Sweetheart
Lollypop, Bubblegum.
.
I was her perfect doll,
a reflection of herself;
to delight and to enthrall—
keep me on a mantle shelf.
.
I wanted to make her proud;
I wanted to be like her.
I did only what she allowed;
no idea what I would prefer.
.
I was her shining star;
she wore me like a flower.
I was trapped in her bell jar;
like a princess in a tower.
.
Then the bell jar cracked
and spoiled the fairy tale;
I saw the Me who lacked
perfection and could fail.
.
I looked at my reflection;
so many flaws to hate—
No one could have affection
for a girl so overweight.
.
Mother looks at me and seems
disappointed and forlorn.
I did not fulfill her dreams;
does she wish I was never born?
.
Losing weight is the only way
to a perfection I can control.
Can she love me as I am,
In this imperfect body and broken soul?
~
Copyrighted and first published on Wattpad in 2012.
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