I CAN'T SAVE US ↠ KAI PARKER

09. I need you

"If I'd known–" Kai began but then he cuts himself off without facing me and he doesn't says anything else for a good while, going deep into whatever thoughts were going through his head and I didn't feel like saying anything too but my head begins to bring back the unpleasant memories of the many funerals I've attended to, leaving me feeling so empty and upset. The silent only made it worse and part of me begged to hear Kai's voice again, rambling on whatever nonsense, so he could me forget about all of it. I felt his stare once again and he finally broke the silence "Would it be... too much if I stop the car to just hold you?" he asked and I looked at him giving him a warm smile "I mean it... you have this look... and since you really like my hugs as much as I like hugging you, well I don't know about you but it sounds like a pretty good deal to me" he jokes at the last part making me smile a little and I thank him for it in my head.

"Isn't it like two hours to the French Quarter? It'll become three if we stop" I joked focusing on the road again, part of me wanted to immediately tell him to stop because I wanted to be held by him and I knew it would make me feel so much better but it would also make me want to let all that grief in... and there was no way in hell I was going through that.

"One and a half now and I can set a timer, we can make it a fifteen minute hug and resume it once we get to the festival" he suggested and I chuckled at how genuine he sounded, so I took his right hand holding it, intertwining our fingers as a I placed both our hands over my lap.

"We'll make it a full hour hug once we get there" I told him giving him a smile and he smiled back at me, his blue eyes completely focused on mine for a minute until he looked back at the road again, squeezing my hand tighter as he does.

"One thing I'll give little fang is that he made us bond more than I could" he said ironically and I just chuckled.

"See, you should really get a 'little fang'. I'm sure if you bond with him from the moment he's born, he'll get used to the whole vampire thing and he'll love you, you'll be his daddy" I told him playfully and he laughed which only made me smile.

"Tell you what, I'll get a 'little fang' and be his daddy but only if you're his mommy" he said with a smirk on his lips and I just shook my head laughing.

"Then I guess you won't be a daddy at all" I said sarcastically and he chuckled, opening his mouth to say something but then he shakes his head laughing again, stopping himself from saying whatever he was going to.

"What? What were you going to say?" I asked him, looking at him but he kept his eyes on the road with a smile on his face.

"Oh, how the tables have turned" he said ironically "Well, well, well. The only way I'm telling you is if you share that thought you still owe me" he added and I frowned pretending to be confused.

"What thought? I completely forgot what it was" I lied avoiding his stare and he chuckled again.

"Babe you keep forgetting I can tell when you lie" he said and I felt my heart flip at how he so casually called me 'babe' again, maybe it was completely wrong from me but the thought of getting used to it, didn't actually seemed so bad.

"It wouldn't make any sense now, that conversation died ages ago" I told him and he hummed in response.

"Or I could just repeat what I said last and it'll be like we're reliving the moment all over again" he insisted and I just chuckled still not willing to share such thought with him.

"It's really bad Kai, trust me, you don't want to hear it and I was dehydrated remember? so I wasn't thinking straight" I warned him and he smirked.

"Now I'm beyond curious," he said raising his eyebrows "mine's really bad too and completely inappropriate if you consider that I'm thinking straight, so if you think about it, yours can't really be that bad"