Josh POV
She laid down in front of me a picture of the women whom I was to marry.
"Isn't she pretty."
"Yes, mother."
"She's going to be a wonderful wife, don't you agree?"
"Yes,mother." My heart wasn't in it as I recited the all to familiar words.
I haven't even met the girl and she expected me to 'love' her.
"Are you ready to meet your mate, son?" Mother asked, her hair a perfect knot, as usual. She was a perfectionist about everything.
Today was the day I met my mate.
I was just wondering if I wanted this or my mother.
"I'm nervous, how do you know she's my mate?" I crossed our empty home to sit next to her, my body was tense knowing how she acted to these questions before.
My eyes drifted to the 'dark room' as she called it, and my entire body shivered.
"Because it's been like this for centuries! Josh you shouldn't worry."
"What if I don't like her?" My uncertainty showed even though I tried to hide it.
Her eyes became cold,"You will. Understood?"
Not like you're giving me a choice.
"Yes mother, I understand."
I couldn't find any fondness as she spoke her next words, "You will stay with your mate, and you will have children with her. I will not tolerate anything else. That means none of your silly thoughts."
Silly? How was feeling genuine affection towards the same sex silly? Why did every one make it sound like it is some childhood fantasy like I actually have control over it.
"Yes mother, I understand."
"Good. No son of mine with lay with a man. It's disgusting don't you think?" Great. This again.
I visibly tensed as I remembered all the bad things she's said since she found out.
If I liked girls she would still be proud.
Her lack of tact towards me stung.
"Yes mother. It's vile."
She smiled softly,"Since you seem so confident.. Maybe we could test that theory." Her eyes glared knowing daggers in my direction, cutting me up and hurting more with every wound. Until you become numb that is.
"How could we do that mother?" I deadpanned.
"You maid." Her cold voice carried throughout these halls.
"Yes misstress?"
"I want you to ride Josh until he begs for more."
Did I just hear those words?
Was she serious?! That so inappropriate! She's not even giving Vera a choice.. She probably doesn't even know her name.
My heart dropped. "How could you ask her to do that?! I'm your own son! So what if I don't find girls attractive, that shouldn't mean anything! Ever think that maybe my mate was a b-" I stopped with a firm hand slapped my cheek, sending me to the floor.
I'm such an idiot. I should let my emotions get to me.
"I knew you hadn't changed. Get ready to see your soon to be wife. I hope your life is miserable." She spit on my face and left, likely to hide away in shame.
This is all my falut.
Why couldn't I make anyone proud? Why couldn't I find girls 'hot' as my use to be 'friends' like to put it.
My chest tightened with anxiety, each breath feeling like labor.
I have to leave.
It's better than living a lie and it's better than the rest of the pack finding out only to exile me.
I need to go now.
-
I waited until it was night and my mother slept. Creeping out the doors, I found myself sighing in relief once I was finally outside.
My skin stretched and my bones snapped into place as I took form.
Thick dark locks covered my body in my wolf form. My muscles tired from underuse. That changes tonight, running at full speed away from home.
It was dark but it was a full moon and there were so many stars I could my way fairly well.
I wasn't scared in the slightest, only relieved. I knew mother would make up some story as to why I was gone so no one would tryto follow me.
For the first time I was glad I never made her proud with my true self, in a way it distanced me.
The starlight turned into morning and I was still running, my body was exhausted but I convinced myself to keep running.
I crossed many fields and lakes. I saw a forest up ahead, and as much as I wanted to continue sprinting my legs simply wouldn't comply.
Stopping at one of the outer trees I started laughing, just laughing. I was so glad to be away from that place that even when my lungs were desperate for air I was laughing.
Despite my efforts of reasoning to myself that I was far away already, I still had to continue.
My muscles finally had enough and I collapsed. I heard people talking, I cursed at myself for drifting into slumber at such a risky time.
What if they knew me? My panic couldn't outweigh my sleepiness.
"Are you okay?"
Out of the two heading this way, it was the man speaking. His voice similar to a hymn as he stepped closer.
I've never heard his voice before, now that I could make it out clearly.
I hadn't realized my eyes had shut until I fluttered them open to see his face.
Looking at him was like looking at an abstract painting, each stroke(feature) was infinitely more interesting than the last yet my eyes kept wandering. Tan skin that contrasted to my own heathy gray tone, lemon colored hair, and light green eyes that had flashes of yellow and ice blue.
Damn his eyes are confusing, which color am I suppose to look at?
Light pink lips parted slightly, moving slowly and carefully to form words I couldn't hear.
I relished in the scent of smoke and wildfires. Black wings invaded my vision as I slept.
I have it bad and I don't even know his name. If mother saw me now...
My thoughts from Earlier today flittered through my mind.
Today was the day I met my mate.
(A/n please tell me your thoughts on anything. Literally Anything.)
