Newborn Eyes

Hell

I wake up to find myself in what looks like hell but I can't possibly be sure. The hell I was in before was heated and dark, like there was no hope for living, but this place is different. This place is tight and cold. There is sand on the ground and sandstone rocks/cliffs enclosing the space I am in. I'm not claustrophobic so that helps my situation a little. I walk over to the walls and walk around the edge, running my hand on the side, trying to find a way out. A voice booms from overhead and screams into my ears, "So you've made your choice? You want to die then?"

"No!" I shout back, "I just wanted to figure out what would happen if I did almost die, because of my powers..."

I trail off realizing how stupid I sound. I wanted to know so badly whether or not I would die that I didn't even realize that I could have died immediately. I wait a few minutes before realizing the loud voice isn't going to respond to me again. If I am going to die why doesn't the world get it over with then, I think, am I going to be stuck in this room forever?

I lie down on my stomach and shimmy my way around the room, feeling for air coming from under any of the walls. When I reach the last corner I feel the tiniest rush of air hitting my hand. I start trying to break the wall around the corner. The sand takes a while but eventually I am able to make a hole big enough for me to look through. I lie back down to look through the hole, my bloody hands pressed under my body, staining my clothes. As soon as I look through the hole, I am somehow transported into my house, not the Xena headquarters, my actual house where I live with my aunt and uncle. This place looks different though. The walls are decaying and the house has a layer of dust over it with only footprints to show that someone still lives here. I carefully walk my way into the living room where my uncle is sitting on the couch in front of some sort of memorial. 

It isn't until I walk around to the back of the couch that I see it is mine. There are lit candles around my picture and my uncle is praying, he never prays. He is praying that I am in a better place now. The phone rings in the other room and he gets up to answer it. I follow him into the other room and lean close to the receiver in order to hear the person on the other line. I hear a voice that I would recognize anywhere start to speak, saying, "Hello sir, this is Tyler. I was just checking in on you and seeing how you were doing? It's been a couple of weeks since we last talked."

My uncle starts to answer, saying that he is getting by but I block the sounds out thinking about the fact that Ty is calling my uncle. When did they meet? My uncle actually likes him and they talk on the phone? I tune back into their conversation to hear Tyler speaking again, "I'm so sorry sir, she really was a miracle. I have no idea why she would have taken her own life. I will return the ring to you on Friday, does that sound alright to you?"

The ring? What ring? How did Ty get a ring from my uncle when he said he had never met him before? My uncle agrees to that date and hangs up the phone. He heads back over to the couch and continues to pray as I back out of the house. So did I die or not? "I don't want to die!"  I yell, looking up at the ceiling, "Whoever is up there, I don't want to die! I'm sorry I ever tried this! Please let me wake up!"

After waiting a few minutes with no response I walk out the front door and run to the bus stop. There is no one waiting except me, even though no one can see me. I wait by the bus stop for what seems like five minutes a strange looking bus pulls up. It is black with tiny white engravings of another language trailing around the sides. The door opens to reveal a woman of about 70 driving the bus. She looks over her glasses at me to ask "Where to?"

I look around the bus to see that no one else is riding before answering, "The Xena headquarters please."

She closes the bus doors as I sit down. I guess she wants to get straight to the destination instead of stopping everywhere. My assumption is wrong of course. Apparently everything in this world is not as it normally is. The bus teleports immediately to the Xena headquarters and I am left dizzy and confused as I get off the bus. I thank the driver before stumbling inside. Somehow I make my way up the stairs to Ty's room and I look in before entering, making sure he's there. He is sitting on his bed and I enter quietly even though there is no way for him to know that I am here. In his hand is a black box that contains a ring, I assume it's the one he was talking to my father about. As I get closer I realize that I recognize this ring. I would recognize the opal surrounded by the tiniest of diamonds anywhere. It is my dead mother's wedding ring. But why would Ty have it? Was he planning to propose? I stumble out of the room lightheaded and confused. 

I need to find a calendar immediately! How long was this after I supposedly died? I run down the stairs and into the kitchen where I hope a calendar is on the fridge. There is a calendar and it says that it is currently June. I do not know which day in June but if I was still alive I would still be here in the headquarters. Which means that Ty has already met my uncle and he has given Ty the ring! 

Oh god I need to sit down. I step into the dining room and pull back a chair so I can think. I need to wake up, this has to be some freaky dream. This world doesn't make any sense and I need to get out. Wake up! I put my head in between my knees and feel tears brimming in me eyes. I never actually wanted to die. What the hell was I thinking? Can't I give myself a second chance at life?