Afterlife

04 | The Amazing Astounding Abba

A spit take.

Never thought I'd see one in real life.

Especially one from Queen Harriet which was followed by uncontrollable laughter. The others weren't sure whether to laugh at me or cry for me.

I felt the same.

Queen Harriet made a motion that looked like a spasm, but the guards seemed to understand and they dragged me to her. She is able to stop her laughter and look me straight in the eye.

"I like you." A smile crawls onto her lips which causes me to smile back. Except mine was much more hesitant. "You have spunk."

"Mom!" Jerkius screams behind her in protest. Obviously offended by my amazing burn. I felt proud inside and give him a sneer when she wasn't looking. "Mom, did you see that." He points to me, but I already changed back to my orphan Annie look.

"Junebug, quiet." Queen Harriet snaps back. Jerkius's face heats up immediately, and he slouches back into his seat.

Junebug!

It took everything in my to be quiet and not laugh like a maniac. It was tempting, but no. I wasn't going to laugh even more at Jerkius, just to be sent to a farm, while he sits here being fed grapes. Plus, I was satisfied because that idiotic smirk was finally wiped off his face.

"Aura", Queen Harriet calls and her friend sitting to her left rises. "You will take in-" She pauses and quietly asks me what my name is. I tell her, and she nods. "Abba." I stare at her incredulously. How the heck is this lady so terrible with names. I just told her.

Now I sound like I am named after a Swedish Pop Group.

I missed it, but when I looked back, the smirk has arrived. He sat back in his I'materriblehuman pose and I internally growled. How could one person have so many terrible qualities?

Aura shakes my hand politely, and I shake it back. "Welcome to the Royal Family." She gives a warm smile, and I feel like all my worries are washed away. Also, her skin is so soft.

Like baby butt soft.

That is such a weird simile. It's not like people go around feeling babies butts. But I guess you must know if you have a child. What if you never have children? Then would you have feel your friend's baby's butt? To satisfy you figurative needs? Wait, what.

Aura looks just as confused because I just continue to stare in her eyes like a creep. Pulling away quickly, I attempt to give a warm smile back.

It was more on the constipated side of the spectrum. 

Queen Harriet called a guard who brought a chair back for me. Sadly, it wasn't their extra throne- I wonder if they actually have those- and was just a crappy beach chair. They placed me next to Prince Jerkius who just loved looking down on me. Oh, life can be so cruel.

I mean Death! Death can be so cruel.

The audition for the Next Top Orphan kept going on for hours. A juggler turned farmer. A jokester turned city boy. More and more people flood through. My eyes began to get heavier and heavier, and I found it harder to stay awake.

Wow, Aurora.

Mad respect for actually staying up after that loooong nap. I would've slapped Phillip and gone back to bed. But I think I have done enough slapping for today.

I guess I finally understand Sleeping Beauty.

- ☠ -

"You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen." My eyes flutter open to Dancing Queen by Abba. Hahaha, very funny.