Because Of You...

Because of you...(Part 1)

You made me happy and whole. I thought we were for eternity, infinite and forever, just you and I.

You were all I could ever ask for. After all those kisses, hugs, memories and endearments we shared, I thought it was just you and I against the world.

But I was so naive and oh-so-wrong...

I was a fool to have ever fallen for you. I was blinded by love, that I thought was real...but I was so wrong...I was so blinded that, I couldn't see the facade you had kept up and I just followed you around like the oblivious, lost and lovestruck puppy, I was.

Oh, how I wish I could turn back time just to have you back in my arms...

I slowly saw you distancing yourself from me and how you hung out with all your friends, as if I never existed or worse, as if were strangers from the beginning...

You began acting coldly towards me which was enough to give me goosebumps and bring me to tears.

I slowly and painfully realized that everything we shared was fake and held up by the facade that you kept up. It was all so fake, like it never had happened.

I couldn't handle all the cold shoulders that you gave me on our encounters. Who knew that the loving person that I once knew, would turn into a heartbreaking yet, a beautiful monster.

I ceased following you and trying to win you back. You never gave me a chance. Our relationship was just a game for you. You had never genuinely cared for me and only cared about your wellbeing and reputation.

And here I was, slowly, watching you from afar while you are being engulfed by a beautiful monster.

I wish this was all just a nightmare that had I built, but no, this was the harsh and jagged reality cutting through me like a freshly sharpened knife that, you had created. It slowly tortured me, taunted me and haunted me telling me that I would never get away from this never-ending nightmare no matter what. And believe or not, I was on the edge of my horrid sanity. I lost it all, you, everything and everyone I cared about.

I'm sitting here reminiscing about our perfect relationship that, slowly turned bitter and sour.

You were all I could cling onto during bad times. You were always there, keeping me sane and calm through thick and thin. I loved it, everything about you, but I don't think I could say the same about you after all, I was just a plaything you could toy with and throw away.

I grew depressed as time passed by. I was depressed for days, weeks, months, heck, I was depressed for years, even. Depression was like a monster that feasted on my fears and quenched its thirst upon my horrid nightmares.

I gave up on everything. I never was important. My own parents had abandoned me when I was young, I had been put into an orphanage that kept me safe and secured. But the children in the orphanage also hated me. They bullied me, pushing me around like trash, calling me names I could never imagine about.

But I got through it. I acted like it never had an impact on me, but I was slowly being eaten away by self-loathing and I slowly began to immerse myself in my loneliness.

I had soon gotten out the hell that is called an orphanage. I began my education with the little amount of money that, the orphanage had given me. I soon searched for part-time jobs to keep myself fed and full.

I had gotten a job in a very cozy, cute and quiet coffee shop, where I first worked as a cleaner. Mopping the floors, cleaning the toilets and washing the dishes. The job paid me fairly. But, the money was just barely enough for me to live a mediocre life.

When, I was first introduced to the student body of the university, I was greeted with disgusted looks, glares, sneers and snorts. They looked at me as if I was their new prey.

I slowly shuffled towards the stairs, only to be tripped over by something that someone had set up.

I always got good grades and I was quiet, which automatically classified me as a nerd.

Then the hunt began.

I became the target for every bully in the school. I was used as a punching bag, slave to complete their homework and assignments.

It was all slowly killing me from the inside no matter how alive I looked on the outside. I was stressed. Really, very stressed. All I could think about is completing the bullies' homework so that, I don't get beat up.

I wasn't brave enough to stand up for myself because, I knew that they would just end up howling and roaring laughter when, a strange little kid argued back again at them. I was also struck with fear as, they would go to the extent of sending me death threats to complete their work.

I felt insecure, terrified and pressured. I lived in fear, predicting about what they can and would do to me.

Sigh...what is my life??

The next day, I went to school and seems like there was something going on because, everyone hustled and bustled around like mad people.

I wonder why...

I walked towards the notice board on the right side of the wide hallway, lined with class rooms, floors covered with beige tiles and white colored walls.

I saw that there was a special meeting with students representing their schools. But, I'm not a school representative, or so I though...

The next thing I knew was that, I was being dragged to the hall for the meeting.

And I saw you, other representative of the my school. You were really beautiful. Your brown, messy locks looked so soft that I could just comb my hand through their hair without encountering any knots. You were really fit. You had a cute, round face with freckles scattered over the nose and cheeks, pale complexion, small arched eyebrows, hazel coloured and almond shaped eyes, small button nose, small, rosy lips and a narrow chin. You also, had really slender fingers.

As cliche as it sounds, butterflies erupted in my stomach, my heart beat erratically inside my chest, as I watched you from afar. You were shining brighter than everyone. You were like the human embodiment of a star, which was shined brighter than the sun and the moon put together.

I slowly walked into the massive hall which, could fit at least 4 basketball courts in it. The walls were colored in a soft and creamy white whilst, the floor was covered with mahogany planks and the hall also had a huge stage in the front which, had 1 stairway on each side. And finally, there was a huge detailed door which, was made out of blackwood, decorated with intricate designs of flowers and branching designs, too.

There were tables placed randomly for every school representative. I ventured through the hall to find the table with my school's name on the tag.

I walk towards the huge, circular table. Soon, the other representative joins with me. You sat down next to me, making my poor little heart beat so rapidly that I felt it beat against my ribs and felt like it would jump out of my chest. I watched you talk to the others. It was like you were a fallen angel.

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Is the 1st part good? Please leave some comments and tips. I would really appreciate it. I'm sorry for being away for so long! I hope you all enjoyed this part!