When someone dies you don't ask yourself how you're going to live without them, you ask yourself why they are gone. Sometimes you don't get the answer until you have finally learned how to live without them. So the process repeats itself, again and again through life. A constant cycle of torture. It's called grief, something I'm extremely familiar with.
Grief affects us all in strange ways. To some, it may never get easier, and for others after a few years your pain-free. In my case, you don't know how to grieve. You don't even really know what it is. I can explain grief, I can give you an exact definition, but I can't feel it. Which is funny because I'm surrounded by it.
grief
ɡrēf/
noun
deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone's death.
"she was overcome with grief"
Yet the fact was, I wasn't overcome with grief. I was overcome with trying to feel, something. I was desperate to grieve. I thought by thinking about it I would somehow miraculously feel better.
So here I am this numb girl drowning in everyone else's tears, thinking "What the hell's wrong with me?". The scary thing was that I was sad. To everyone around me, I reacted exactly as any 13-year-old girl would, but the truth was I didn't. It was a facade my mind put on for me. I knew she was gone, I knew I was supposed to cry, but for some reason, I didn't process what was actually happening. For some strange reason, I thought I'd see her again.
It was like nothing had ever happened, yet at the same time everything was different.
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Hey guys!
Lol, havent even finished one book But coming at cha with another ;) These creative juices are flowing...
I hope you guys enjoy this story, it's my main focus at the moment as far as writing goes so expect more frequent updates than Montello. This is more me so I'm going to enjoy writing a lot more. It sorta telling my story a bit while it is also based off the new Netflix series 13 Reasons Why. ( Literally premiered yesterday IM OBSESSED)
You guys are amazing and if we can get to 100 reads I'll post a Q and A on my life, and how I relate to Caroline.
GET READY FOR A CRAZY STORY :)
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Grief
Teen Fictiongrief ɡrēf/ noun deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone's death. "she was overcome with grief" Yet the fact was, I wasn't overcome with grief. I was overcome with trying to feel, something. I was desperate to grieve. I thought by thinking ab...
