The Dreams

Chapter Fifty One

Souma's story ended and Rina found herself speechless. She knew Yuzuki had died and she had some idea of how it might have happened, but hearing Souma's account of it made her heart ache. She could not bring herself to mourn for her past life, but she felt Souma's pain through his retelling. She wanted to reach out to him, to comfort him, but the bars prevented her from doing much more than reaching through to hold his hand.

She gave his hand a gentle squeeze to remind him that she was still here. He looked up at her and smiled, but the shimmer of tears in his eyes spoke volumes. She was the replacement of the one he lost and she was not nearly similar enough to the original.

As much as she wanted to comfort him, she realized she needed some time alone to process this. Being with him right now was giving her an inferiority complex.

"Thank you for telling me what happened," she whispered. "I know it wasn't easy for you to tell me and I'm sorry I made you relive it. I'm just glad I finally know."

"You deserved to know the truth."

She struggled to find the words she wanted to say to express both her concern for him and her need to be alone to process this. She was afraid he would think she was upset with him for telling her if she left so soon.

With a deep breath, she prepared to tell him. "I just need some time alone to process information. Please don't think I'm upset with you or anything. I just... I just need to think."

"It's okay. I understand."

She nodded and waited a moment or two before getting up to leave. She thought her overeagerness to go might hurt him. Of all the things she wanted, hurting Souma was not one of them.

"I'm going to go," she announced as she stood up. She hovered for another moment, unsure if she was ready to go or not. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Take care, Rina."

"Thank you," she said softly before turning and leaving.

She did her best to keep her composure while walking through the halls. Even after walking this route multiple times she did not trust herself to make the trip with her vision blurred and her mind preoccupied with who might see her in such a state. She held herself together by promising that she could cry and process everything once she was in the safety of her room with four walls and a solid door between her and the rest of the world.

By the time she came around the final corner before she could duck into her room she was desperate to finally get away from any potentially scrutinizing eyes. She could feel the emotion starting to well up to the surface as soon as she reached the door.

Beyond that door, she did not find the safe haven she had hoped for. Her few personal items were scattered around the room and the furniture and decor were disturbed and damaged as well. The room was ripped to shreds.

A chill of panic raced up and down her spine. The damage terrified her, which was surely the desired result. This had to be more retribution along the same lines as whatever shew as being punished for all day long.

With nowhere else to go, she resigned herself to cleaning up the mess as best as she could to put it behind her. She was not at all sure that she was safe in this room now, but she was feeling too insecure at the moment to try going back out into the hall. She admitted that she did not think she would feel all the much safer spending the night on the floor outside of Souma's cell if she would even be permitted to do such a thing.

There was not much she could do about the things that were genuinely destroyed. She piled them up in the corner where she could ignore them to the best of her ability. She sadly lost the only pillow to the destruction. Instead, she bunched up a blanket and buried her face in that and let the tears go.