The Dreams

Chapter Thirty One

She could not deny it any longer. Something was changing inside of her. It was no longer just feeling a little off and not quite recognizing herself in the mirror first thing in the morning. Now she felt as though her own mind was being invaded.

It started out innocently enough. She would have a thought that seemed to come out of nowhere. It was no big deal, just a little odd. Stray thoughts like that were the sort of thing that could be easily ignored if she was not already on high alert.

With everything else that had been happening to her, she definitely took note of those strange little thoughts that did not seem to belong. It was not something she could really explain so it was one of those little concerns that she kept to herself. She knew she would probably never hear the end of it if Hibiki found out that she was hiding possible symptoms. That did not change the fact that she did not know how to even begin to explain without sounding as though she was losing her mind.

As time progressed the problem seemed to grow as well. Stray thoughts started to take on a voice of their own — she had a voice in her head and it was not her own. She could certainly explain that, but she was not entirely sure she wanted to do it. Hearing voices was a sign of madness the last time she checked.

At least the voice was not telling her to do anything. She knew it was just a voice. Well, most of the time she knew it was just a voice, but the rest of the time she hoped it was at least harmless.

The voice said things in her mind that made no sense. Just going about her day Rina would hear a whisper of a thought in her mind. Lately she heard whispers about her sister. She knew it was not her own thoughts. She did not have a sister.

She tried her best to ignore it, but her day kept getting disrupted by this little whispers about getting to see her sister. The voice was just loud enough to interrupt any other thoughts bouncing around in her head and derail her conversations or actions.

Once the voice reached this distracting volume she knew she could not even attempt to hide it from Hibiki any longer. Her own thoughts were getting interrupted and she did not know if or when she would get derailed mid-conversation.

She knew once this voice in her head reached this point that she would not be able to hide it for long. She did not want Hibiki to find out about it from her current problem as she continued to try to cover it up for him. He needed to know and she finally admitted to herself that she needed to be the one to tell him. He would handle it better if she told him rather than finding out on his own.

She screwed up her courage and made herself speak up. The only reason this felt so difficult now was because she had not said something as soon as she noticed it. If she kept putting it off she would only find it that much harder to do.

There was no time like the present, she tried to tell herself. Knowing she could not go back in time to tell him sooner to make it all that less painful meant that she had to speak up now before it became even more difficult.

"Hibiki?" she hesitantly got his attention.

He was immediately brought to attention by the sound of her voice. She wondered why she ever thought that she should withhold information from him.

"Could I talk to you in private for a minute?" she asked with an annoying squeak in her voice that made her inwardly cringe.

"Of course," he agreed.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him along up the stairs. There was only one place she could think to take him where they at least would have a bit of privacy. Even Kouta left them alone most of the time if they were in Hibiki's room and kept the door closed.