Fade in to Serena's cottage, seen from POV of Calem and Lefou.)
Lefou: Heh! Oh boy! Belle's gonna get the surprise of her life, huh Calem.
Calem: Yep. This is her lucky day!(Calem lets go of a branch, which swings back and hits Lefou in the mouth. Calem turns to the band, wedding guests and others, apparently just out of sight of Serena's cottage.)
Calem: I'd like to thank you all for coming to my wedding. But first, I better go in there and... propose to the girl! (minister, baker, and others laugh heartily. Camera pans quickly to show Pokegirls crying their eyes out. To Lefou) Now, you Lefou. When Belle and I come out that door--
Lefou: Oh I know, I know! (He turns and begins directing the band in "Here Comes the Bride." Calem slams baritone over his head.)
Calem: Not yet!
Lefou: (From inside the instrument) Sorry!
(Cut to interior of cottage. Serena is sitting in a chair reading her new book. There is a knock at the door. She puts the book down and walks to the door. She reaches up and pulls down a viewing device. She peeks through and sees ananachronistically accurate fish-eye view of Calem. She groans, and pushes the door open.)
Serena: Calem, what a pleasant...surprise.
Calem: Isn't it though? I'm just full of surprises. You know, Serena. There's not a girl in town who wouldn't love to be in your shoes. This is the day...(Calem pauses by a mirror and licks his teeth clean.) This is the day your dreams come true.
Serena: What do you know about my dreams, Calem?
Calem: Plenty. Here, picture this. (Calem plops down in the chair and props his mud-covered feet up on Serena's book. He begins to kick off his boots and wiggle his toes through his hole-y socks.) A rustic hunting lodge, my latest kill roasting on the fire, and my little wife, massaging my feet, while the little ones play with the Growlithe. (Serena looks positively disgusted. Calem gets up next to her face.) We'll have six or seven.
Serena: Growlithe?
Calem: No, Serena! Strapping boys, like me!
Serena: Imagine that. (She picks up her book, places a mark in it, and puts it on the shelf.)
Calem: And do you know who that wife will be?
Serena: Let me think.
Calem: (Corners Serena ) You, Serena!
Serena: (Ducking under Calems's arms) Calem, I'm speechless. I really don't know what to say.
Calem: (Pushing chairs and things out of the way until he reaches serena and traps her against the door) Say you'll marry me.
Serena: (Reaching for the doorknob) I'm very sorry, Calem, but I just don't deserve you. (She twists the knob and the door opens (this time outward). Serena ducks under Calem as he tumbles out the door and into the mud.)(The wedding band begins to play "Here Comes the Bride." Calem's boots are thrown out of the door (now opened inward) and the door is slammed shut. Lefou,who is directing the band, looks down and sees Calem's legs sticking out of the mud, and a PIERRE's head sticking up. Lefou cuts off the band, and Calem's head pops up, with the pig on top of him. He tilts his head, and the pig slides down his back.)
Lefou: So, how'd it go?
Calem: (Picks up Lefou by the neck) I'll have Serena for my wife, make no mistake about that! (Calem drops Lefou into the mud.)
YOU ARE READING
Beauty and the Beast
FanfictionThe fantastic journey of Serena, a bright, beautiful and independent young woman who is taken prisoner by a beast in his castle. Despite her fears, she befriends the castle's enchanted staff and learns to look beyond the Beast's hideous exterior and...
