[DEEWAAR- The wall of Love] ✔ J.Series

-18-

South Africa,Cape town:
6th August 2015

Main apne maqsad ki khatir yahan agaya,aur wahan maine Azaan se rabton ke sare zaraye khatam krdye.Main ek jinn tha,lihaza jo bhi krta usse ilm tk na hota.Lekin maine uske paas ek chota sa pthar rkhwa dya tha jo kisi jinn ki maujudgi main roshni deta.Ye hmare guroh main jaan se qeemti cheez mani jati hay kiuke agar iska hona kisi insan ko ye pata de day ke wahan jinn maujud hay tw phir wo peeron aur aamilon ko bula kar hmain qabze main krke hmara jeena haram krdete hain.

Main ne filhal higher studies of Islamic education ke liye yahan ana munasib samjha.Meri pehli seerhi yahi se shuru honi thi,deen pr amal krne ke liye deen ka ilm bhi hona zaruri tha.

Main ne filhal yahan sirf apni shakhsiyat ki development mai apna waqt aur apni jan sarf krne ka fesla le lya tha aur isiwajah se main Tafheem-ul-Quran ka course kr rha tha.

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Quetta, Pakistan

Usko yahan se gaye huay taqreeban 6 mahine ho gye thay,uske jate hi pata nahi kiun mjhe aesa laga ke main apne se mohabbat krne wale insan ko shayad kho chuki hu.Lekin aesa nahi tha,main janti thi ke Huzbaan mjhse bohat mohabat krta hay aur wo meri khatir,meri sharait ko poora karna Yahan se door gya hay.Shayad mjhe usse mohabbat ho rhi thi ya phir ya uski mohabbat ki aadat thi,jo bhi ehsas tha bohat muztarib kye rkhta tha.

'Beta Azaan,tumhe dekhne log aye hain'

Jee ammi?

'Jaldi se tyar ho jao meri bachi shabash,Allah tumhare naseeb buland kre.

Ammi mjhe ... Ap janti tw hain kya bat hui thi 5,6 mahine pehle! Phir kiun ap mere rishte ki fikar main ghul rahi hain? Maine kaha na ap se main abhi sukun se rehna chahti hun aur wese bhi apko abhi Apa pe focus krna chahye,nani bnne wali hain ap.

' Tum tw chup hi krjao,pata nahi dono bap beti mil kr mera dimagh khrab krke pagalkhane bhijwana kiun chahte hain.Kya bigara hay maine tum logon ka? Chalo Sajid se baat nahi bani,usmai Allah ki maslihat thi aur wajah bhi samne agayai. '

Tw ammi ap ye bhool rahi hain shayad ke wajah kiske zarye samne ayi!

Mjhe pata nahi kya hogya tha ke main kiun Huzban ki side lene lg gyi thi,jbke sach kahu tw main shayad usse pasnd bhi nahi krti thi.Zahir hay karu bhi kese.Koi apki mohabbat ko apke samne yun zaleel kre,uske aib khol kr rkhde tw wo insan tw nazron main krwa hi bnjata hay na...phir chahe wo batein sach hi kiun na ho.Han agar bat sachi mohabbat ki na ho,tb albatta koi faraq nahi prta.

' Tumhara dimagh na satak gya hay aur tumhare baba bhi tumhari tarah hi moti moti pyar ki patti bandh kr Huzban ko dekh rhe hain. Yad rkhna wo sabit kr bhi de ke wo tumhare ehal hay,phir bhi mai ye shadi ke liye harghiz razi nahi hugi. '

Ammi pls... Mjhe sirf chand arsa sukun chahye pls... Meri bat smjhne ki koshish krein,ap ye kiun nahi smjh rhi ke Huzban waqai mjhse....

Ammi meri baat sunne ke liye nahi ruki thee wo bohat zyada naraz theen aur isi wajah se apna akhri fesla sunate huay chli gyi theen.

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*Sajid*

Main jab hospital se farigh hua,tw wahan ke staff se puchne par pata chla ke Azaan mere sath hi thi.Aur wo yahan se kb chli gyi ye mjhe pata nahi chla.

Lwkin mjhe itna yaad tha ke usne jo batein mjhse ki thee wo toot kr bikhar rhi thi,magar phir bhi uski mohabbat apni jagah pr qayim thi... Ya phir shayad ye mera wehm tha... Herat ki baat tw ye hay k hum kisi ko agar chahte hain tw usse takleef aur dard kiun dete hain,aur uske bawjood sitam par sitam krne ke baad bhi mohabbat ki tawaqa aur aas dil se khtm nahi hoti.Aik ajeeb sa bharosa hota hay mehbub pr ke uski mohabbat hmare liye bohat gehri hay,jo zakham lgne ke bawjud apni tag-o-do laga kr isi koshish main rehti hay ke wo saans leti rahe.

Lekin jistrah Azaan mjhe chor kr chli gyi thi,meri ye umeed ab bilkul toot chuki thi.Ye sab mjhe pehle se hi jaan lena chahye tha ke koi hay jo mere pyar pr apna pyar zahir kr rha hay aur zahir hi nahi zeher bhi ghol rha hay.Uske bhai ko marna meri majburi thi,taake uske baba kuch bhi bata den us passage ke bare mai jisse janne ka kam mere supurd kya gya tha aur ye mission mere liye meri jan se zyada eham tha... Lekin ab main ye sochne pr mjboor hogya tha ke kya waqai itna eham tha wo mission ke main sach mai apni jaan dao pe laga du? Khas kr tab jb meri jaan meri mohabbat hay...

Jab mjhe ye khbar mili ke wahan se rishte ki baat ab cancel hochuki hay,mere sar pe goya saton asman gir kr mjhe dher kr gye haun.Main Azaan se itni mohabbat krta tha ke uske liye apna mission bhi chor skta tha chahe uske liye mjhe apni jaan ki qurbani hi kiun na deni prjaye.

Jb koi humse ghalti hoti hay ya phir gunah hota hay,tw uske kaffare ke liye kuch na kuch barra hi krna hota hay.

Aur ab main ne bhi soch lya tha ke mjhe kya karna hay.