Too Broken

chapter twelve

Hope's POV

"Hope, what are you doing here?" Nick says.  "I've got something to tell you. I... I... Was wrong, Nick... I...." my phone interrupts me while I was trying to pour my heart out.

Ugh, it's my dad. "Hello?" I finally answer.

"Hello Hope, thank God you answered. Your mum - your mum is..." he starts crying. All the possibilities are going through my mind. What happened to her?

"Tell me what happened, please dad." I cough up.

"Cheryl was in an accident... She is currently undergoing surgery... They don't know if she will make it." he says and starts crying again.

At that very moment everything seems to slow down, Nick doesn't exist anymore. Everything disappears. Everything is gone. My mum and I just made up and she can die at any moment. Why does God do this? Take people away from me? First my father, then my mum. Oh mum, please don't leave me. My mum is suppose to see me get married, see her first grandchild. Please God, if you can hear me right now. Please save her for me. Please. I know I have no right to be begging you, but I need her. Please. She can't leave me. I'll be alone. I'll end up being alone.

Tears seem to be falling from face as I crash to the floor. I don't notice a warmth around me. It's Nick, he is hugging me. I feel safe in his warms. I would stay here forever. I have to go and see my mother. I need to see her.

"What's wrong Hope?" he says with a raspy voice. "It's... It's my mother, she was in an accident..." I cry even more than before. Nick pulls me onto his chest. And his heart is beating so fast. His heart with mine. Oh, how I wish I could wake everyday to this.

"Don't worry Hope, your Mom is strong. She will make it."

"And what if she doesn't?"

"Then you'll have me and your dad... I'll always be there for you Hope. Always. Till infinity."

"Till infinity?"

"Till infinity."

"You pinky promise?"

"I pinky promise. Till infinity."

And with those five words, it meant so much to me. It was our thing. Like Hazel and Augustus' okay. Ours was till infinity.

"I need to see her Nick, I need to see her. Will you take me there... Please ?"

"Of course Hope."

We slowly get up from where we were sitting on the ground. Nick intertwines our hands, God... Why does this feel so good?

My mother could die. I'm broken and she will break me even further. Just when Nick is slowly starting to repair me. Why does this always happen? Why can't I ever be happy? It's like someone put a curse on me.

Nick takes my keys out of my jacket pocket and puts me in passenger. He gets in on the other side. I can tell his hurting. He loves me. And here he is, taking me to my mother. I hurt him. I hurt everyone around me. I always do. His eyes is prove of it. There is nothing but sadness. No glimpse of happiness. I wish I could make him happy. I wish I could be the one that makes his day always brighter. His go to. His right hand. His everything. His mind seems to be on another planet. His not here in the car. I wonder what's he thinking about. Does he even love me anymore? After what I've said. I love Nick. I really do.

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Nick's POV

She's here with me, I wonder why she came to me in the first place. I mean like dude. I know I was wrong to think of her as a challenge. But I fell in love with her, I wouldn't have told her if I hadn't fell in love.

She has a beautiful soul, a beautiful mind and a beautiful heart. Even her exterior beauty is the most beautiful imperfections.

I want to kiss those lips so bad it's like just there. Like fuck, I can't take advantage of her like that. I love her. So fucking much. I wouldn't mind waking up next to her everyday. The past few weeks with her is amazing.

I want us to be together. I want us to have children. I want her to be my wife. She turns me on in so many ways. Just the way she looks at me gives me a feeling in my stomach. What's that feeling again? I think some girls call it butterflies. Fuck, this is so cliche. Cliche is my whole freaking life. I fall in love with someone I can't have. I was hurt when she said she didn't love me. It felt like someone was tearing my heart right at that moment. It was like a chainsaw cutting my heart out and nails being hammered into my heart. I want her to love me. I want her to need me as much I need her. She makes my life complete. Even when my mother didn't love me as she should. While I was busy fixing Hope, she doesn't even know that she was fixing me.

We arrive at the hospital. We sitting in her car. Just sitting. Nothing being said. When there is so much to be said. I'm even scared to look at Hope. I hate to see her sad. I hate it.

"Nick, I need you to hold me. Please?" I'm shocked by her question. I want to hold her so bad. I want to feel her in ways that not even Kyle could feel. I want to touch her heart and make us one. I want her. I need her.

I don't even answer her. I grab her gently and move her on my lap. She is laying like a baby. Her heart is beating fast. I think mine is too. Everything seems to disappear. Just me and her. I wouldn't mind kissing her. Fuck, I'm having impure thoughts, while her mother was in an accident.

She looks up to me, it's like she needs me. She desperately wants to be close. And I would do anything for her. Anything.

She puts her lips on mine. It takes me a few seconds to respond. God, this feels good. It feels like an explosion in my stomach. No girl has ever made me feel this way. No one. Hope starts straddling on me. Fuck, what is she doing to me? I thought she was a virgin. It feels like she has done this a million times before. But I hate the feeling of her kissing someone else. I was only suppose to kiss her. Feel her. Be with her. I want to be her hero.

Moans are escaping my mouth. Hers as well. Just the sound of her saying my name is a double turn on. We pull apart just to take a breath. She pulls me back for more. I wonder if I make her feel the way she makes me feel. I feel her panties soaking wet on my sweatpants or maybe it's the both of us. I want more of her. Fuck! She gets wet just by making out with me. I could think of many ways to make wet. Stop these thoughts Nick. I think to myself. But she feels so good on top of me. I will make her feel things that would make her want more. She would crave more.

Her hands starts grabbing around me so tightly. As she pulls as closer together. I can tell she is wanting more. But not now. I want this to be special. I want to make her feel special.

I love her so much.

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Hope's POV

The way he is making me feeling. God, it feels so good.

I love him so much.

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Nick's POV? How was it?

Sorry for all spelling or grammatical errors. Trying my best.

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Till infinity.