Shawn Mendes Imagines

Memories

Quick A/N: check out my other Shawn fanfic called Memories. Thanks xx

Shawn's POV

I remembered waking up to her footsteps as she got up out of bed. They made a song that sounded so simple, but it certainly danced in my head.

On days I felt like I couldn't get through, it soothed me. It made me believe that the next day, I would wake up to those footsteps once again.

And I did.

I thought that we'd be together, watching our children play at the park as we sit there, my arm wrapped around her shoulders, and growing old together, and just facing death itself together. I thought we'd be forever.

But I guess I was wrong.

For the last few months, she'd been complaining about how her muscles ached, how she felt lightheaded.

So, we got it checked out. It turned out that she had stage four cancer. I wasn't even going to sugar coat it.

I remembered the times where she would tell me to let her go when she passed, but I always refused. I never wanted to forget someone so dear to me, someone who taught me how to love.

I remembered that she loved to write. She had this diary, and just before she passed away, she gave it to me with a weak smile and teary eyes. By then, I was already crying.

"Read through this, and count how many times I wrote about us."

More than two hundred times. Specifically, two-hundred-and-eighty-five times.

"I can't let go of you. I love you."

"Move on, Shawn. I don't want you to mourn over me. I... love you... more."

Those were her last words. And those words itself were enough to break me inside out.

I remembered trying to do as she said, but until now, almost two years later, I still haven't let go of her.

What a disappointment I must've been.

I put the small ring back into its box and put it in my nightstand drawer.

I sighed. I didn't even have the chance to propose to her.

I walked outside, remembering to buy her favorite flowers along the way to the cemetery.

When I arrived, I placed the flowers on her grave and tears started to come. I realized it never really got better.

"I'm sorry for being such a mess, baby. I just can't-" I choked on my own words. "I just can't let go of you."

I took some time to finally stop crying like a baby.

"I have to go now," I said, standing up, kissing my thumb and placing it on her stone. "Just know that I love you more, no matter what you say. Tell our baby I love her, too."
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Hey guys! I'm back with another sad imagine. IT HURT ME TO WRITE THIS IM ALMOST CRYING
(Did you get the Try My Best reference btw?)
And no I'm not gonna do the outro because I'm just gonna cry thanks for reading I can't rn