For Him

Chapter 32- Healing

The entire day, Blaine was acting off. Kurt couldn't think of one thing that Blaine said at the dinner table, not including "How was your day?" It wasn't that Kurt was a poor listener- or dominated the conversation- it was Blaine's lack of response, or lack of anything else, really, except for the occasional bite of food and the hum to show Kurt that he was somewhat paying attention.

It was like he was in his own little world as Kurt talked and talked to make up for the silence on the other end. Blaine stared. He stared at his plate, at the wall, and the window, but never at Kurt. Never at Kurt's eyes, which were searching for approval and for any sign of living in the shallow corpse that seemed so be Blaine Anderson at the dinner table.

Something was wrong, and Kurt knew it. Never had Blaine been so quiet, never had their conversation been so one-sided, and never had Blaine had any other excuse than to look at Kurt.

So, they finished their dinner quietly, and cleared off the table quietly, and washed the dishes quietly until Blaine had spoken for one of the first times that day.

"That was the last of it, right?" Blaine asked, looking at the stack of clean plates and silverware.

"That was it," Kurt smiled at him and dried his hands on a towel. "A grueling 5 minutes it took- blood, sweat, tears, and dish soap, but we made it."

Blaine tried to grin in response, but all that resulted was a twitch of his lips and a heavy sigh. Kurt frowned, and moved closer to him.

"Hey, are you feeling alright? You're not acting like yourself." His hand reached out to feel his forehead, but before it could get too close, the boy winced and took steps back. "Blaine?"

"I'm fine," Blaine rubbed his eyes, "I'm fine I just... haven't had much sleep lately."

"Oh. Well why don't you lay in our bed and I'll-"

"'Our bed,'" Blaine interrupted, with a harsh tone and emotionless laugh.

"Huh?"

"You said 'our bed.' Technically, it's still your bed, but I'm just sleeping in it."

He started pacing back and forth in the kitchen, pointing at the air as he imagined a visual that showed his scattered thoughts in a neat and organized way. Back and forth he went, trying to figure out everything, everything he had ever known and everything he would know all the the same time. Everything seemed so confusing all of a sudden.

"Blaine, you're shaking," Kurt said, his voice wavering, as he brought up his hands to catch Blaine in case he fell. Seeing the hands that came closer, Blaine moved the opposite way. "Come on, sit down. We can talk about this later."

Blaine turned and shook his head, "No, we can talk about this now. I've been thinking about what you said last night, Kurt."

"Yeah?"

Kurt knew he wasn't going to win. Blaine was never a stubborn person, unless it came to his own health. He would put others before himself in a heartbeat, and has done so too many times before. His selflessness was something that Kurt both admired and hated. Admired for the way he had so much of his heart to give around, and never held it back from someone who had wronged him so many times, and hurt him deeply. Hated for the way Blaine didn't care for himself as much as he cared for the people around him, as if his life meant nothing next to others, as if he was worthless. Blaine definitely wasn't worthless, and Kurt knew that the most.