Daydream-Rucas

Love

I couldn't even comprehend what was happening. 

It was almost a blur. Tears immediately start forming again as my family and I heard the incoming news. 

" I am so sorry to inform you guys that Auggie has passed away due to the trauma and blood loss from the car accident," the doctor explained. 

I wasn't sure what to do. Cry on the floor again? Hug my family? Hope for the better days? Hope that maybe Auggie didn't actually die? 

All those questions swirling into my head yet the only thing I'm able to do is stand there. Stand there and look like a complete idiot as my parents are crying deeply to each other. Lucas was standing there in utter shock as well. 

I just wanted Auggie. I couldn't face the inevitable fact that he's gone. That he is now up there. Already looking down at us in comfort and hope.

Hope that soon we will get better. 

The doctor tried to talk to my parents and help sympathize, but it wasn't working. I already knew the next couple of months would be harsh. It would be dark. 

Without any thought I walk over to the hospital room. Step by step as I slowly walk past the cries and the sorrows from my parents. Lucas didn't even notice that time. 

I just needed to see Auggie one last time. Just once.

I reach to grab the handle of the cold door and swing it open, trying to find Auggie. But he was nowhere. They had already taken him. Auggie was gone. 

Gone in the midst of the thin air. Thats when it hit me. 

Thats when it all hit me in this huge gust of wind. I didn't want to be in that hospital anymore. I didn't want to be near anyone anymore. My life was empty without him. 

I wouldn't have anyone that could cheer me up as much as Auggie has. 

I wouldn't have anyone that was always cautious and always put themselves before me. 

Auggie was it all. He was the angel in my life. He was my little brother. He was gone. 

I don't even turn to see my parents nor Lucas and just run out. This time I hear no footsteps following me. This time I don't pass my parents on the way out. This time no one cared. 

I run over to the park nearby the hospital and just collapse on one of the benches. The slow, cold breeze brushed my hair back. I was alone once again in this park. The park that helped me gather my thoughts.

" I should've been there for him. I should've just been there to pick him up. I should be laying there dead, not him," I whisper angrily to myself. He didn't deserve any of that pain. 

I did. No matter how many times Lucas or anyone tells me I shouldn't blame myself for the things that happen to the people I love, I know its true. I know for a fact that if I actually picked him up like I was supposed too, he wouldn't be there. He wouldn't be in heaven. 

Tears dripped in a pattern down my worn out cheeks. Happiness long gone, farther in reach now. Hope was slowly drifting away. It always came back to where it started. Where I was never happy. 

Every time something good happened, a repercussion of bad things happened against it. It felt like my heart was utterly ripped out of my chest. I lost someone this very day and somehow I felt like I lost myself. 

But I wasn't the only one hurting. My mom, the beautiful Topanga, and my father, the wonderful Cory. Lucas, the one who I love so much, soon its going to be everyone. My aunts, my uncles, his friends. 

I'm not the only one hurting because of Auggie's death. I shouldn't be here. Thoughts rushed in a sudden blur. I shouldn't be sitting here by myself, hurting when I can be in that hospital with Lucas and my parents. 

Trying to comfort them and make them feel better. Something they have always been doing for me. 

I ran. I ran and ran until I reached the hospital, wiping my tears away along with my guilt. 

I needed to do what Auggie once did for me. For everyone. 

I need to be there for others. I need to show that I will care and love them no matter what. That with everything happening, I will always stand by their side. Im not leaving soon. Step by step we will all get better. Together. 

I'm not losing the people that I love, not anymore. 

847 words

A/N: Im back and here cool. Ok. So GMW ended. Netflix idk if they are picking them up or not, but gmw is gone. Its news that Im sure people who loved gmw is sad about. Even though its ending, we can be sure that is ended well. Rucas is endgame and it ended beautifully. Lets hope one day all of them can achieve even bigger things.