Falling Petals of a Blue Rose

Chapter 9

“No need to apologize. Sometimes things just happen that way. Are you alright now?”

“Yes, I’m fine. I just had a rough night that’s all.”

“Oh I see.” Marisa looked at the schedule to see what she had left for the day. She was a little relieved to see that she didn’t have any afternoon appointments scheduled. Yet at the same time, she couldn’t focus on what needed to be done. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t stop thinking about Thomas. The harder she tried the more he came to mind. She began to feel a deep urge of some kind though she wasn’t sure what.

“Maybe I should talk with someone. I already talked to Mom and May May. Yet, I still feel unsatisfied. Am I just being greedy? If I’ve already talked to them, who else is there?” That’s when it came to her.

“Dr. David, I’m sorry but would you mind taking care of one more patient for me? I have something I need to do real quick.” Dr. David smiled.

“No problem. Go right ahead and leave everything to me.” With that said, Marisa walked out of the room.

   After taking the elevator up a couple floors, she walked down the hall and into one of her patient’s room.

“Hello? Mrs. Sampson?”

“Oh, hello there, doctor. What a pleasant surprise.” Marisa looked down to see her holding a piece of paper.

“Is that a letter from your son?”

“Yes, it says he misses me and hopes he’ll be able to come visit me soon.”

“Is he doing well?”

“Oh yes, he says he hopes that I will soon feel as strong and healthy as he is. He’s such a sweet boy. Someone whom I am proud to call my son.” Mrs. Sampson smiled as she stared at the letter. Marisa couldn’t help but smile.

“Is there something wrong, dear? You seem troubled.” Marisa realized there was no point in trying to hide anything. The fact that she was upset was just too obvious.

“Actually, there’s something I was hoping to talk to you about.” Marisa sat down and slowly explained her situation. Mrs. Sampson just sat there and listened patiently.

“I know it’s not healthy for me to go on like this, but I just don’t know what else to do. It would be nice to have a special someone in my life and I do still hope for it in many ways. Yet at the same time, I’m afraid to face the unknown. I’ve already experienced the feelings of heartbreak and it’s something I don’t ever want to feel again. That’s why I’m so unsure about what I should be doing.” To her surprise, Mrs. Sampson smiled.

“There’s no need to be ashamed of anything, dear. I went through the exact same thing when I lost my first love.” Marisa's eyes widened. She watched as Mrs. Sampson reached over and picked up a frame on her bed desk. It was a photo of a young man, a young woman, and a baby boy.

“The truth is that my husband was not my first love. There was a time I was deeply in love with another. He was someone I had known from childhood. My heart would be filled with so much joy just by being near him. I had hoped for nothing more than the chance to be with him.” For a minute, she just remained quiet as she stared at the wall.

“So what happened?” Marisa asked. Mrs. Sampson smiled.

“Well, naturally I told him how I felt about him. I told him that I had liked him since we first met.”

“What did he say?”

“Nothing. He didn’t say one word. Instead, he just walked away.” Marisa’s eyes widened.

“So then what did you do?”

“Well, of course I wasn’t about to give up. I did everything I could possibly think of to get close to him. Some things which I must admit might have been going a little too far.” She admitted as she let out a chuckle.

“Even so, that didn’t stop him from finding someone else. After I learned of this, I became very broken hearted. My whole body and heart just shut down altogether. It seemed even time itself came to a stand still. For a long time, I wondered if there was any point in going on anymore.” Mrs. Sampson just smiled as she stared at her picture.

“So how were you able to pull yourself back up? Was it because you had support from your family and friends like I did?”

“Well, yes that was part of the reason.” Marisa formed a confused look on her face.

“Part of the reason?”

“Yes, it’s true that I had my wonderful family and friends there for me. But during that time, I realized something. I realized that, no matter what happens, you should never just give up on life. After all, life is a precious thing. It’s not something that can just be thrown away because not everything works out the way you hope it will. Even though it seemed like I was alone, I realized I never really was. I had my family and friends. With them by my side, I would never be alone.” Marisa looked at her feet.

“That’s just how I feel.” She thought to herself.

“So, I did the only thing I could think of doing.” Marisa lifted her head.

“And what was that?”

“I moved on. I realized I couldn’t just sit around and expect good things to come my way. I had to make them happen. No matter what the odds were, I just had to keep pushing myself forward.” Marisa formed a surprised look on her face.

“But weren’t you nervous?”

“Oh of course I was. But than again, it’s okay to be scared. Sometimes it’s good to take chances and risks. Even if it only succeeds in making things worse than they were before.” Mrs. Sampson smiled as she looked Marisa in the eye.

“Than again, there’s always the chance that it could change things for the better.” Marisa’s face brightened.

“That’s one thing about life. Even though it is full of unexpected twists and turns, that’s just what it means to be a human being. After all, once you have your heart set on something you should reach out and grab it. Don’t let anything stand in your way, not even fear.” Marisa gasped as she remembered she said the exact same thing to Maggie one time. Before she knew what had come over her, a tear rolled down her face.

“So than...is it really okay...to just forget about the past and move on with life?” Mrs. Sampson smiled.

“Of course it is, dear. After all, sometimes the future can turn out to be more glamorous than you ever could have imagined. Just like it was for me. I wouldn’t trade the life I lived for anything.” At that moment, Marisa lost herself as tears flowed out of her eyes. Throwing her hands over her face, she buried her head in the bed’s blankets and cried. Mrs. Sampson just smiled as she patted Marisa’s head.

“So than, do you know what you want to do now?” Marisa finally brought her head up as she wiped her face.

“I...I want to see him...I want to see Thomas. I only spent a short time with him, but I had so much fun. I want to spend more time with him and understand him. I...I want to see him!” Mrs. Sampson smiled.

“Than go and see him, dear. Nothing is holding you back except your own doubt. Now that you understand that, you should go on and take control of your future. Don’t let anything hold you back ever again. Even if times become tough, you should always just keep moving forward.” Marisa wiped her face off and stood up with a smile.

“I will.”